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Commentary: 'Have you considered helping boys?' The other gender gap

Lisa Britton, Los Angeles Times on

Published in Op Eds

Seven years ago, when I was a nonpartisan advocate for girls and women, I faced a startling question from a supportive Senate staffer: “Have you considered helping boys? They really need our help now.”

I resisted the urge to cringe. Instead of dismissing her point, I dived into the research and discovered a real, mostly ignored crisis facing boys and men. There was another surprise in the data: Liberal parents are uniquely positioned to make progress.

Women have fought hard for progress and personal freedom, breaking down barriers for women and girls, and that’s worth celebrating. But boys and men are facing crises that have been ignored for too long, and it’s time we extend our empathy to them and support efforts today for more compassion and resources being directed their way. We should champion efforts like Gov. Gavin Newsom’s recent executive order aimed at addressing the growing crisis of suicide and social disconnection among boys and young men. Because if we root for only one sex to win, both sexes will lose.

A Brookings report highlights that both conservative and liberal parents — both mothers and fathers — express greater concern about the futures of their sons than those of their daughters.

Curiously, when asked about children in general — not their own — conservatives were more concerned about boys than about girls, and liberals expressed greater concern for girls.

This disparity underscores a blind spot: Liberal parents must recognize that the struggles of boys are not just isolated issues affecting their individual families; the experiences reflect a systemic bias that demands our attention.

Today, we face a significant gender gap in education. In colleges across the United States, nearly 60% of students are women. The gender gap in higher education is now wider than it was when Title IX was enacted in 1972, but flipped in the opposite direction. Yet, where is the national campaign to address this imbalance?

Why aren’t we working to bring this back to center? Why have we abandoned “equality”?

Women now earn the majority of associate’s, bachelor’s, master’s and doctoral degrees, yet efforts to boost female achievement still often overshadow the need to support men.

Instead of questioning what’s “wrong” with boys, we should be examining the systems that are failing them. Our education system may not be designed to align with the general nature of boys, many of whom thrive in environments that encourage active engagement, hands-on learning and flexibility.

The crisis extends beyond boys’ education to adult men’s mental health, loneliness and well-being. Men are four times more likely to die by suicide than women and make up 71% of drug overdoses, yet our cultural narrative often blames their reluctance to “open up” or points to “toxic masculinity” as the root cause.

 

Men’s health, in general, is another area where disparities are stark. The United States has eight federal offices dedicated to women’s health — and none for men. The data would seem to point policy makers in the other direction: Men have worse health outcomes than women, experiencing more illness and dying younger.

This imbalance speaks volumes. If we truly value the health and well-being of the boys and men in our lives, we must advocate for federal and state initiatives that address men’s health.

The challenges facing boys and men today are interconnected, spanning education, mental health, physical well-being, the family court system and societal narratives. They are the results of a confluence of events, including cultural and technological changes that have disproportionately hit men and boys.

To address these disparities, we need leaders — women and men, Republicans and Democrats — who will champion equitable resources and systemic reforms.

The starting point has to be to think big. We must build an education system that nurtures the potential of all students, a mental health system that provides compassionate and effective care, and a healthcare system that recognizes the unique needs of boys and men.

And at the cultural level, we should rethink narratives that blame and shame our boys. It’s time to find compassion for boys and men.

A shift in public perspective is overdue, and progress can accelerate if women — particularly those with liberal values — champion this cause, because the future isn’t female: The future is everyone.

____

Lisa Britton is a writer for Evie magazine and an advocate for boys, men and fathers. She lives in Los Angeles. X:@LisaBritton.

_____


©2025 Los Angeles Times. Visit at latimes.com. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.

 

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