ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend booked a trip, and she's going to be gone on my birthday. I have been planning my 30th birthday for four months; I put so much time and effort into planning it, and she won't be attending. We've been friends for eight years, and I just assumed that she was going to be there. I asked her why she scheduled her ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Since some political figures have demonstrated and encouraged boorish behavior, what was once seen as good breeding is now eschewed as unnecessary or unmanly. Is there still a place in such a world for civility?

Many cringe-worthy statements are applauded by a (thin) majority of people in the U.S.

GENTLE READER: Well, that's...Read more

Dear Annie: I always pictured summer as the one time of year when our family could finally slow down. During the school year, we are all racing from homework to practices to carpools to late dinners. I thought summer would bring beach days, lazy mornings, cookouts and maybe one real vacation where we could reconnect without everyone checking a...Read more

DEAR ABBY: Our nephew "Conrad" is engaged to be married soon. For several reasons, we are unable to attend the wedding. Under normal circumstances, I wouldn't hesitate to send a generous gift as I have for our other nieces and nephews. However, Conrad is not normal. He doesn't speak to me, my husband or our children, two of whom are his age. We ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I found out that my fiance recently went to his ex-girlfriend's birthday party, and he didn't tell me. My fiance and I have been dating for three years and have been engaged for six months, but I can tell it's been hard for him to fully let go of his ex because they dated for eight years. Part of me wants to understand where he's...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: What is wrong with tourists looking like tourists? Do they expect us to pack fancy clothes?

A local tour guide chewed out all of us Americans for wearing shorts, halter tops, sandals and backpacks. "Would you dress this way in your capital?" he kept saying.

Frankly, yes -- I would, and I have. It's damn hot in our fine ...Read more

Dear Annie: My younger sister has always been the "fun one" in our family. She breezes in late with a bottle of wine and a funny story, and somehow everyone forgives her before she has even taken off her coat. She forgets birthdays, cancels plans at the last minute and borrows money she never seems to pay back. My parents still smile and say, ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I'm 56 years old and have been married for 12 years. I don't want to drive an hour and a half to spend time with my husband's grandbabies. I have done that on many occasions and choose not to do it anymore. I'm not into babies -- or children, for that matter. He continues to ask me to go and can't understand why I don't want to. I ...Read more

I'd argue that I'm not a hoarder. My husband would like to contest that. I explained to him that a middle-class life is not complete without a drawer of odds and ends in the kitchen. He said that one drawer sounds plausible, "but," he said, and started to point at more than one drawer around the kitchen that could fit the bill.

However, my ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: After many years living near and helping my parents, I moved to another state to retire. My dad died three months after I moved. I begged my mother to let me fly back and help her with his arrangements, but she insisted I stay put.

Some weeks later, and two days after we had talked on the phone, she secretly buried my dad's ashes ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My brother is moving to rural Vietnam for a year to teach English, and I don't think this is a good idea. My brother can't stick to any commitment to save his life, and this experience doesn't seem like it is likely to go any differently. He gets excited about new opportunities all the time, but once the excitement wears off, he ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Whenever someone brings donuts into the office, there are always a few people who cut a donut in half and leave one half in the box.

I feel this is rude, as it is unappetizing to see food that has been cut up and left. I understand they only want half a donut, but I feel they should take the whole thing and throw half away, ...Read more

Dear Annie: I sit here writing to you starting another week much like the past six months of this year: depressed by the way time has altered my life.

I'm 76 and married. My routine rarely changes. I wake up, listen to the news and eat breakfast. I straighten up the house and make the bed. I sometimes go shopping or have doctor's visits. I ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have two best friends going back to third grade (we're in our 30s now) and one older sister. I'm the last in my friend group to get married. My fiancee and I are eloping this summer. We already own a house and need nothing, so I told my mother and sister that a bridal shower is unnecessary. Plus, since we are eloping, I felt it rude...Read more