ArcaMax

========

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole

DEAR MISS MANNERS: Every year, like clockwork, a certain co-worker extends an invite to join his family at Christmas or Thanksgiving, as he knows that occasionally I am away from home and relatives for the given holiday.

Each time, I decline with thanks. I do not enjoy his company, professionally or personally, and would prefer to celebrate my ...Read more

Dear Annie: I'm a 31-year-old woman and have managed a small business for four years. I'm stern but fair, very capable and very attractive. I've dealt successfully with skepticism and flirtation, and I have always maintained my dignity and friendliness. A few days ago, however, I had an experience that severely shook me.

From my office, I ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My sister-in-law "Leah" has been a poor money manager all her life. She is in significant credit card debt and had to borrow money to help pay for her wedding, despite the fact that she has been a teacher for decades. She has never been a saver -- always a spender.

When my husband passed away recently, he left me with $1 million in ...Read more

========

(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My daughter is again hosting Thanksgiving for my small family, plus six people who work for her husband who have no family in town. It's a total of 12 to 15 people.

About 10 days in advance, my daughter usually sends out a text asking what each of us is bringing. But when we reply with what we're making, she often responds ...Read more

Dear Annie: My husband and I are empty nesters, and we've begun the very slow process of downsizing our home. I wasn't expecting it to be so emotional. Going through decades of family memories has been harder than I imagined. I just can't believe how quickly time goes by.

I admit I'm a bit of a hoarder when it comes to my kids. I still have ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: A family member, "April," recently lost her partner. Although I deeply disliked the individual, I was able to muster an "I'm sorry" when he passed. Then, April started posting how long they'd been married. (They weren't married.) If her timeline is accurate, then he would have been with her at the state women's prison, where she was ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I are both from large families, and over the years, we have worked hard to stay connected to them. We have sent all the nieces and nephews generous birthday, holiday and graduation gifts. We and several of our siblings have hosted numerous parties and holiday gatherings -- usually two or three times a year.

My ...Read more

Dear Annie: A co-worker of mine is repeatedly late -- late to meetings, late with deadlines, late to answer messages. Every time, she is over-the-top apologetic. She has some elaborate excuse (which could be true, for all I know), apologizes at length, and acknowledges how much her lateness affects me and the rest of the team. I end up in the ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My sister, "Randee," and I are experiencing a falling-out with our older brother, "Darren," which has left us hurt and confused. We come from a large, tightly knit family, and there's always some sort of celebration happening. We siblings are in our 40s and 50s, so there are also lots of nieces and nephews.

Darren and his wife ...Read more

Furniture gets nicked. Plates get chipped. But femininity damaged? That was the complaint I was hearing the other day from a man very dear to me -- my son, Scott. He was saying that so many women he's meeting are not very feminine. His words echoed many letters in my inbox these days. Out of respect for both sources, these thoughts:

Women have ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We have a sidler in our family!

Whether at my house or hers, my daughter-in-law will silently sidle into a room behind me, and watch me from out of sight. I may be working in the kitchen or playing with a grandchild when I have a sudden feeling of being watched -- then I turn around and there she is, having silently walked ...Read more

Dear Annie: I am 62 years old and the oldest of four siblings. For the past three years, I've been the primary caregiver for our 87-year-old mother, who has become increasingly frail and can no longer manage on her own.

I love my mother dearly, but I'm exhausted. I take her to doctor's appointments, manage her medications, buy her groceries, ...Read more