Life Advice
/Health
Slighted by Not Being Invited
Dear Annie: I don't know how to act. My husband's nephew is getting married in another state. We heard all the aunts and uncles were invited, but we never received a save the date or an invite.
My sisters-in-law and mother-in-law are aware that we didn't get an invite. A couple brothers-in-law asked if we were attending the wedding -- ...Read more
Celebrating on Your Own Time
Dear Annie: I often read letters from parents and grandparents expressing sadness about not being able to spend holidays with their children or grandchildren, and I'd like to offer a suggestion based on my own experience.
Growing up, my parents divorced when I was young, and holidays were often split between households. However, my mother ...Read more
Let Down by Longtime Friend
Dear Annie: I've had a friend for over 30 years whom I've always helped out. I provided him with work when he needed money, loaned him money, and supported him through his divorce and various other issues over the years. I was always happy to do so and never expected anything in return.
A couple of years ago, he was selling some furniture ...Read more
Snubbed by So-Called Friend
Dear Annie: I tend not to tell people when they hurt my feelings because it feels rude to correct others' choices. This is especially true when it comes to social invitations. A few weeks ago, I had lunch with someone I consider a very close friend. We see each other a few times a month and have even traveled together. During lunch, they were ...Read more
Feeling Forgotten
Dear Annie: I've been in a relationship for almost four years now, and while things with my partner are great, I've been feeling increasingly frustrated by how his family treats me -- specifically when it comes to birthdays. His family has this tradition where they celebrate every member's birthday with gifts, cards and a special ...Read more
My Husband Won't Respect My Privacy
Dear Annie: I have had a few health issues recently. During tests, my doctor incidentally found a mass on my spleen. I asked my husband not to tell anyone, except our kids who are 24 and 33.
I found out he told the neighbor down the street. I am upset. I haven't said anything yet to the rest of my family or friends. He argued (yes, argued) ...Read more
The Struggle to Find In-Person Therapy
Dear Annie: I read your postings in our local newspaper every day, and I've noticed that you often tell people to seek help from a professional counselor before making big decisions.
I agree this is an important step, but I've found that counselors and psychologists are so busy that they either aren't taking new clients or they only want to ...Read more
Family Fallout
Dear Annie: I am struggling with conflicting feelings over feeling disrespected by family members. I was not especially close to my sister, but we did see each other occasionally and text/talk on social media.
My stepdaughter was attacked and bitten by my sister's dog a couple of years ago. My stepdaughter's biological mother chose to sue my ...Read more
Parent Left Behind
Dear Annie: I'm sitting here contemplating my life. I'm 65, ill and live alone with my little dog. Fifteen years ago, my only daughter asked for space while completing her master's thesis. I gave her space, but since then, I've only seen her about five times. I've begged her to talk to me and asked for her forgiveness, but nothing has changed....Read more
Posting Without Permission
Dear Annie: I really don't like having my picture taken because I don't feel photogenic. I've asked my husband multiple times not to post any photos of me on his social media without my permission. However, every now and then, he disregards my feelings and posts them anyway. Each time, I remind him of how I feel and ask him to respect my ...Read more
When a Sister Cuts Ties
Dear Annie: I'm struggling with a painful situation involving my sister. About a year ago, she abruptly stopped speaking to me, and there was no discussion or clear explanation about why this happened. Since then, she has kept her distance not just from me but also from our entire family. She's excluded us from all major family gatherings, ...Read more
Finding the Right Words
Dear Annie: I proudly served in the military for nearly 40 years, and during that time, I experienced a wide range of challenges and rewards. Now, in civilian life, whenever people find out about my service, their immediate response is often, "Thank you for your service." While I deeply appreciate the sentiment, I find myself unsure of how to ...Read more
Wealthy Cousin Wants to Bury Grudges
Dear Annie: I am writing to you basically needing advice on a matter of snobbery and arrogance.
This in regard to one of my relatives. They say money changes people, and in this case, I think it has.
I'm now past 70 years of age. I have a male first cousin near my age. We grew up in the same Midwestern town only a few miles apart. Let's call...Read more
Wife Weighs Divorce or Saving Broken Marriage
Dear Annie: I have been with my husband since high school, so we've been together for 14 years and married for seven. I love him very much, but I'm starting to hate him.
He is angry every day. He comes home from work and doesn't pay attention to our children. I do all the cleaning in the house. He's been getting into his religion again; I'm ...Read more
Supporting a Family Member Struggling With Addiction
Dear Annie: I enjoy your column, and I appreciate your perspective. I have a family member whom I have loved dearly and shared family tragedies with.
Over the years, he has become a severe alcoholic. I have had to create boundaries, namely not answering rambling phone conversations. I respond to long voice messages with texts. I express my ...Read more
When to Speak Up Versus Walk Away
Dear Annie: I have a sister-in-law who can't seem to attend any family gathering without cornering someone for a confrontation. For years, that someone was me. I waited for my husband to step in, but after nothing changed, I finally decided to set some boundaries. Looking back, I wish I had spoken up sooner, but I hesitated because she's my ...Read more
The 'Other' Grandmother
Dear Annie: I am the mother of two wonderful sons, both married to equally wonderful women. While I am grateful for the love and partnership they have found, I can wholeheartedly relate to the sentiments shared in "One Grieving Grandmother to Another."
Both of my daughters-in-law are incredibly close to their own mothers. It's a beautiful ...Read more
The Bra Dilemma: Balancing Personal Comfort With Social Expectations
Dear Annie: It's been seven years now that I've engaged in this personal yet somewhat controversial choice, and I still can't help but wonder -- am I crossing a line in certain settings, or is this just my anxiety playing tricks on me again, amplifying what might be nothing more than mundane thoughts?
To give you some context, I've always ...Read more
Escaping Overbearing In-Laws
Dear Annie: I married a man who was an only child, and throughout our marriage, his parents never let go of him. They wanted to be involved in every aspect of our lives and visited our home daily. I managed to set some boundaries at first, but after we had a child, their involvement became unbearable. They would arrive at our house by 7 a.m. ...Read more
Older Moms Share Their Wisdom
Dear Readers: I have thoroughly enjoyed reading your many responses to "Left Speechless," the 55-year-old mother who felt herself struggling with how to reply to strangers when asked if she is her childrens' mother or grandmother. We have such a supportive and insightful Dear Annie community (filled with many wonderful mothers!).
Here were ...Read more