ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a first-generation college student, and lately I have been feeling some serious guilt about it. I can't put my finger on one exact reason that I feel so guilty. I feel bad for leaving my parents. I feel bad that they had to take out loans for me to be in school. I even feel bad that I'm having such a good time in college, ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently had dinner with my ex-husband. Our divorce was finalized nearly two years ago, and we had not spoken since. I was hoping that we could reconnect and perhaps explore the possibility of a friendship. I'm not sure what I was expecting when we met for dinner, but I wasn't expecting the outcome that I got.

Halfway through ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend of three years proposed to me at my graduation party. It was a complete surprise. While I'm thrilled that we're now engaged, I'm a little upset that he proposed during a day that was special to me for my own reasons. I wish he had planned something completely separate that would not have taken away from my moment at ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel awful about the way I treated my adopted sibling when I was younger. I am now an adult, but I was 5 years old when my mother adopted my foster sister. She was 11. I have memories of poking fun at her for being adopted and for looking different than I did. When she turned 18, she moved away and lost touch with all of us ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My parents are feuding and have been for quite some time. I usually duck out of the room when they start in on each other, but things have escalated of late. I am living at home this year because I haven't found a job yet after graduating from college during the pandemic. I feel horrible that I am not yet independent and worse ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I never taught my son how to manage money. Now he is away at college, and it seems like he is always asking me to add money into his bank account. I see that he is not buying anything extravagant -- mainly he buys snacks and things for school -- but I cannot afford to be his ATM. Plus, he needs to learn how to manage what he's ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend "Molly" and I were both injured in an accident, and her family is blaming me. Molly and I are both college seniors. A little while back, we were driving to school in the middle of the day when we were rear-ended by a drunk driver. It was a scary accident, to say the least. Molly sustained a concussion and two broken ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am 35 years old, and I have been the primary caretaker for my two younger sisters for the past eight years. I've cared for them since they were in elementary school, and I cannot afford to take care of them any longer. I've been speaking privately to family members about my situation, and a few of them have offered to take them...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been keeping up with a high-profile celebrity trial that deals with domestic violence between a man and a woman. My boyfriend and I were discussing the trial the other day over the phone. He was adamant about defending the male celebrity, even though he had been physically violent toward the female celebrity. He made a ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: For several years -- beginning around the same time that the pandemic started -- I was deeply depressed. I was unhappy with the way that I looked, my job, my finances and my relationship. For all of those reasons, I was very low-functioning. I did not go out with friends, I did not take pictures and I barely left my house for ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I don't get along with my mother-in-law. She is too judgmental. Whenever I see her, she immediately picks something about me to criticize. It could be my outfit, especially if it's new and pretty, or my body -- she notices every pound that I put on. When I talk, she often accuses me of trying to talk over her, so she starts to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I made friends with a group of women this summer who were so kind. We have known each other for a while, but we bonded in a different way recently. Normally we only see one another during the summer in our beach community. I feel like I would like to stay in touch with them during the rest of the year, too. I'm not sure how to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have two siblings who live far away from the town we grew up in. I am the main caregiver for my ailing father. I live nearby, and naturally I assume the primary leadership role in making sure he's cared for and goes to his doctors' visits, sees me and my kids regularly, everything. I'm fine with that. I knew it would be this ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I am a Black woman who has worked as an urgent care nurse for almost three years. I love my job, and I hope to work in this field for the rest of my life. I was recently assigned to care for an elderly female patient with dementia. I know that it could be her dementia talking, but she has made several racist remarks to me since ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm going into high school now, and my parents still won't let me have my own social media account: no TikTok, Facebook, Snapchat, Twitter or Instagram. They think it's bad for me and unsafe. Although I agree in some respects, I feel like I'm getting old enough that I should be able to have social media and act responsibly. Every...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I invited my co-workers to my graduation party, and none of them showed up. Now I want to resign.

My co-workers have never made me feel welcome in the 10 months that I've been with our company. When I first started, I admired how close all of my co-workers were with one another. I've made efforts to connect with everyone in my ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently had to let go of an employee, mainly due to budget cuts at my company. But if I am honest, it is also because he was not a high performer. There were often gaps in his job skillset. Even though I pointed out his shortfalls and made recommendations for how he could do his job better during the time we worked together, ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend didn't defend me against another man, and now I can't look at him the same.

My boyfriend and I were out at a nightclub over the weekend when a drunk man started to verbally harass me. He shouted several profanities at me for no reason. The man was eventually escorted out of the club, but I was visibly upset well ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel like I can never say no when I am asked to do something. This is getting to be a problem because I feel like I am stretched too thin. My job is stressful, and the stakes are high right now. As a result, my boss is piling on more and more work.

In my personal life, my friends rely on me to help them whenever they are in a ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend "Mary" threw a small and intimate event over the weekend, and I ended up running into my ex-boyfriend there. He was there with his date, who just happens to be close friends with Mary. I felt blindsided. I wish Mary had warned me that he might be there, or that he is now dating a friend of hers. She must have known who ...Read more