ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: I stayed at my friend's family-owned bed and breakfast a while ago, and they still haven't refunded my security deposit. I called the front desk formally to ask about it, and they said to contact my bank. My bank said I need to contact the hotel. I'm getting the runaround. Should I confront my friend about this now? -- Friend's ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My neighbor is an elderly woman who lives alone because her husband passed away a few years ago and her children live in a different state. We've never been close -- perhaps because my block isn't the friendliest. Nonetheless, I want to reach out to her and let her know that we are here if she wants to come over for dinner or ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: When the pandemic hit and we were all sent home, my job went remote. After about six months, I moved in with my parents because I couldn't afford my apartment in the city. Now, nearly two years later, my company is saying we all have to come back to the office in the fall. There's no firm date yet, but it will be soon. I don't ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friends genuinely feel that because they do not like my boyfriend, I should consider leaving him. My boyfriend is great to me, but my friends question where he is going in his career. I sometimes question his career path as well, but we've been dating for only a few months, and I've seen major strides from him. How do I tell ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was visiting with a good friend recently and noticed as he was looking at his phone that he had been watching ear wax removal videos. I asked him about it because it looked like he had a lot of these videos open. It seemed weird and kind of gross to me, and I really couldn't figure out why this seemingly normal guy would be ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boss constantly hits on me, and it makes me extremely uncomfortable. I don't want to risk losing my job by complaining, but he's becoming too much. He's starting to do it in front of others, and it makes me not want to come in to work most days. I live alone, and I have to pay my bills, so I don't really know how to handle it....Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My grandmother has been sick for about a year. She's slowly losing control of her body and mind. She's not capable of living alone as she can't walk much and shows early signs of dementia. She has a live-in caretaker. My mom often goes over there to spend time with her and provide social connection. However, every time my mom ...Read more

DEAR READERS: It's hard to believe that it has been 20 years since the world changed forever -- since those planes crashed into the World Trade Center in New York City, at the Pentagon and in Pennsylvania. All of us who were alive at the time have stories of exactly where we were and what we were doing when this hateful act of terror was ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been dating the same guy for a year now. I adore him, and I really enjoy spending time with him. We go to the movies and on walks together. We go out to dinner together and volunteer at a local hospital. We know each other's favorite foods and what to do when each other is sad. But we haven't said I love you yet. To me, it ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: There are a lot of things that I do not like about my dad. He can be very condescending and a bit of a chauvinist. I do not like the way that he speaks to my mother. She is kind and gentle, and my dad talks to her as if she's some type of indentured servant. I'm married now, and I find myself sometimes speaking to my wife in a ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: A girl who used to go out of her way to be rude to me is now trying to be my friend on social media. I've never been one to hold a grudge, but I do remember how awful she used to make me feel for no reason at all. Do you think she may have ulterior motives by trying to befriend me all these years later? Could it be guilt? -- ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently dug up some pictures of the women that my fiance dated before me. I couldn't help but notice that they look nothing like me. I'm a tall, full-figured Black woman, and every single girl he dated before me was petite and white. I'm now wondering how he could even be attracted to me if that was his type. Should I ask him ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My neighbor has been asking to get together for dinner quite frequently. Each time I leave the house, it feels like she extends another invitation. I, however, don't really like her. I think she's mean and has questionable morals. I don't want to spend the evening with her or accept her invitation out of pity. I also don't want ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend told me he doesn't own a suit or dress shoes because he has never needed them. I suppose this makes sense in theory, but I just can't understand why a grown man wouldn't own any formal clothing. Even my 15-year-old brother owns a suit. Is this a red flag? -- Buy a Suit

DEAR BUY A SUIT: Rather than thinking of this ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just saw a post on social media from a woman I worked with years ago. Unlike me, she looks even healthier after the pandemic, social isolation and slothfulness that defined the past year-and-a-half for me. This woman is at least 75, and she looks 50. She had on a bathing suit, and her legs looked tight and lean. OK, yes, I am ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I quit a job on the first day of training. It was a restaurant job. The environment was so stressful and awful I could just tell it wasn't going to work out. The same day that I quit, I received a slew of hateful text messages from an unknown number; I'm assuming it was the girl who trained me. Should I go and say something to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My college professor passed away unexpectedly last weekend. She and I never really got along, but I had a lot of respect for her as my professor. Because we didn't have the best relationship, and at times I could be quite rude to her, I'm feeling a bit of guilt. She wasn't much older than my mother and has kids that are the same ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter is going away to college. It dawned on me the other day that I've never taught her how to cook. She plans on living in the dorms for the first year of school, but I'm afraid she'll be ill-prepared when she lives on her own. She leaves for school in less than a month. Is she going to be OK? -- Leaving Home

DEAR ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have to deliver a speech tomorrow in front of 50 individuals. It is for my summer program's closing ceremony. Although public speaking is a fairly easy task to many, it's rather daunting to me. I get so scared I'll mess up or slur my words that I start to sweat. I'm even scared of forgetting what I have to say. Do you have any ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: The other day, I left my house in a rush and forgot the key to the main entrance of my apartment complex on the table. When I returned about an hour later, I spotted my neighbor, who I usually see outside while she's walking her dog. I politely asked her if she could open the gate for me since I left my keys inside. She looked at...Read more