Life Advice
/Health
Financial Stress Causes Feelings Of Isolation
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm feeling completely overwhelmed by my financial situation. With paying off student loans, covering my living expenses and trying to save for the future, I feel like I'm barely keeping my head above water. Rent alone takes up half of my paycheck, and despite budgeting carefully, I'm struggling to make any real progress. I don't...Read more
Roommate Annoyed By Man's Nosiness
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a roommate who is incredibly nosy, and it's driving me crazy. He's always asking questions that are way too personal, and it's starting to make me uncomfortable in my own home. I try to be polite and friendly, but he doesn't seem to pick up on the fact that some things are just none of his business. For example, the other ...Read more
Friend Upset By Man's Assumption Of Interest
DEAR HARRIETTE: A childhood friend of mine has been in a relationship for more than five years now. He and his partner live together and share a car, and he covers some of her expenses, etc. They are fully enthralled. But honestly, I get the sense that he was never truly fulfilled by his choice. He always tells their story as if things just sort...Read more
Employee Wants To End Things With Co-Worker
DEAR HARRIETTE: I made the mistake of getting involved with a co-worker. At first it seemed really harmless to me because we were accustomed to hanging out socially (mostly in groups after work). When he asked me on a date, it felt like a natural progression. After a few dates, we progressed some more. Things started off as a fun and casual ...Read more
Girlfriend Compelled To Clean After Intimacy
DEAR HARRIETTE: Whenever my girlfriend and I are intimate, she showers immediately after. At first it was just her, but now she forces me to join her in a post-intercourse shower. In these showers, I've noticed that she scrubs relentlessly -- ferociously, even. It scares me a bit because I wonder what she's trying to get rid of or wash away. She...Read more
Job-Seeker Debates Opportunity Based On Location
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently managed to land a job after months of searching in this tough job market, and while I'm incredibly grateful for the opportunity, I'm struggling with the decision to take it. The job is exactly what I've been looking for in terms of compensation, responsibilities and career growth. It's the perfect fit on paper, and it ...Read more
Boyfriend Visiting Family Abroad Stops Communicating
DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend is currently visiting his family in South Africa, and ever since he got there, he's stopped calling and texting me regularly. Normally, he's a great communicator, and we talk and text throughout the day, so this sudden change has caught me off guard. I understand that we're in different time zones right now, and I ...Read more
Entertainment Employee Worried About Long-Term Future
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am currently working in an industry that I love, but it is unstable. I've been working on the creative side of TV and film for the past eight years. I am currently employed and thankfully have never experienced being laid off. I've done a lot of freelance work, so I know what it feels like for a project to end, but honestly, I ...Read more
Friend Shares Honest Opinion About Woman's Boyfriend
DEAR HARRIETTE: A friend of mine is in a relationship, and in my opinion, her partner is not good to her. From what she tells me and what I observe, he seems selfish, abrasive, cheap and not affectionate or protective of her. At a social event, he asked me jokingly why it feels like I don't like him. I gave him a serious answer -- a diluted ...Read more
Ex Looking For Place To Stay After Breakup
DEAR HARRIETTE: My ex-partner and the father of all five of our grown children recently broke up with his longtime girlfriend. This is a woman he began dating around 20 years ago when he decided to leave me to raise our children alone. While he didn't fully abandon our children, he did betray us, and I was left to explain why. He is now abruptly...Read more
Empty Nester Feels Overwhelmed By Life Changes
DEAR HARRIETTE: The past year has been full of change for me ... way too much change. Early last year, I lost my job. It was a job I had nurtured for the past 25 years, a place I'd been attached to since I graduated college, a job that saw me get married and have two children. That was a hard loss.
Not long after, my youngest child graduated ...Read more
Single Father Sets Boundaries With Girlfriend
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am in a relationship with a man who is a single parent of two children. It seems as though his ex left their family not too long after their second child was born -- perhaps postpartum. My partner and I have a great relationship, and I love his girls. They are sweet and funny, and I'm always happy to help and support them. ...Read more
Lonely Reader Wants To Meet Online Friend In Real Life
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been in touch with someone I have been meeting online for the past two years. We both have the same physical condition, but he's more outgoing and has a full social life, whereas I am the opposite. I have started attending events at the organization where he works to get support for my needs, but we have never introduced ...Read more
Husband Refuses To Stop Smoking Weed
DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband smokes weed pretty much every day. During the pandemic, he got to the point of smoking all day long from before sunrise until going to sleep. We were all at home then, and it was infuriating to have to smell smoke while I was working in the other room. Fast forward to several years later, and the trend hasn't changed ...Read more
Relationship Changes After Starting Business
DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend and I have been dating for four years. For a while, it felt like we were building a life together -- a real future. We dreamed together. Aside from the love we shared as romantic partners, we were both ambitious and helped push each other along in our careers as well. Over time and after much trust was built, we ...Read more
Sister Tired Of Being Default Babysitter
DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been an aunt since I was 9 years old. I am 29 now, the youngest of five sisters and an aunt to 11 nieces and nephews. For as long as I can remember, I've been the default babysitter. I live at home with my mom, which seems to be a prime location for all of my sisters when they need parental relief. Sometimes they show up ...Read more
Friend Feels Fomo Over Group Hangs
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm in my 20s, and lately, I've been struggling with a serious case of FOMO (fear of missing out). Most of my friends are in a position where they can afford to go out regularly, whether it's dinners at trendy restaurants, nights out at bars or even weekend getaways. I am on a much tighter budget, and I can't keep up financially....Read more
Employee Wants To Repair Team Dynamics
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm struggling to cope with the toxic dynamics within my team at work. Instead of collaborating to solve problems or improve processes, it feels like everyone is constantly pointing fingers and blaming one another for mistakes. This blame game has created a tense and unproductive environment, and it's starting to take a toll on ...Read more
Parent Reconsiders Hosting Daughter's Birthday Party
DEAR HARRIETTE: My 13-year-old daughter recently got into trouble at school, and now I'm torn about whether to let her go ahead with the birthday party we've been planning for her.
The situation at school was serious: She was caught being disrespectful to a teacher and breaking some of the school rules. When I spoke to her about it, she seemed ...Read more
First Date Debacle Raises Questions
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently went on a first date with a guy, and I'm trying to decide if I should give him another chance. On one hand, he was kind and respectful toward me, which I really appreciated. However, there were a few things that made me feel unsure about whether I want to continue seeing him.
First, he invited me out for drinks, and I...Read more