ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: For the past few years, I have hung out with a small group of people in our sleepy summer community. During the COVID-19 pandemic, the group was really small for health purposes. I like most of the people, but one woman rubs me the wrong way. We are all still loosely connected, mainly because it's a small place.

I went over to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend is a pothead. He smokes first thing in the morning and all day long. Most of his friends do the same. At first, I liked it; I used to smoke a lot, too. But that was years ago. Now I am working a professional job and trying to build my career. It drives me crazy to wake up to the smell of weed every morning and go to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have been partying pretty hard since the pandemic started. That's a good two years -- maybe a little more if I'm totally honest. Partying means drinking, smoking, hanging out. For the most part, it hasn't been such a big deal. Sometimes I have gotten a little sick to my stomach, but then I pull back.

Anyhow, this summer as I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend lost her mother last year. I tried to be there for her however I could, but of course there were many times when I was not sure how to show up for her. We had a heart-to-heart recently, and she confessed to me that she was disappointed in the lack of support she received from me last year. She said she felt that I ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend recently told me that she has a girlfriend. A few months ago, she was dating a guy. I don't really care, but it is confusing for me to keep up with her romantic life, and she really wants me to. I told her that I don't care who she dates as long as she is happy. What I'm having a problem with is getting her to believe ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My fiance has a large group of friends. I do not have many friends at all, so I was hoping to skip having a bridal party altogether. My fiance is disappointed by this because he was excited to be able to have all of his friends be a part of our wedding. I understand, but I just don't have enough friends to match his groomsmen, ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I stay with a family friend every time I visit my son at college. It is so kind of her to offer to put me up. She is incredibly generous with her home and hospitality. She won't allow me to give her any money, but I feel like I should give her something. She often compliments me on my outfits. Do you think it would be OK to gift ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I went to college orientation with my son, and he ran into a few students from his high school. He immediately began to talk to them, and at the same time, he completely ignored me. He did not introduce me to them or anything. When I asked him to introduce me, he told me it felt awkward because he knew the name of only one of the...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: After months of hard work, I'm finally happy and comfortable with my current weight. I've been documenting my fitness journey on Instagram. I've been receiving a ton of positive comments from strangers and acquaintances, but also some backhanded compliments from the people I happen to be the closest to. My aunt commented, "Keep ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I have a new boss, and I feel like this is a new opportunity. For two years I worked with a woman who always talked over me and rarely listened. I stuck around because I liked the company and needed the job. I think if I share my ideas with my new boss and show her how much of an asset I can be to the business, she may begin to ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My guy friend knew that I was getting cheated on but didn't say anything to me about it. He never liked my ex-boyfriend. He warned me a few times that the man that I was with was not a good person, but he never gave me a specific reason as to why he felt that way, so I brushed it off. When I found out that I was being cheated on,...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: Due to a series of extremely negative situations that occurred, my husband and I stopped being friends with the first couple that we befriended when we started dating years ago. Now that our daughter is about to go to college, we realize that these two are our only friends who did not participate in our daughter's graduation ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My 25-year-old daughter showed up visibly drunk to our family dinner. I know that she is a grown adult, but we were at dinner with her conservative grandparents who don't condone alcohol consumption at all. She was loud and a bit sloppy, and I didn't appreciate it. Out of respect for the elders in her family, I think she should ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: From time to time, I have these nightmares about my fiance and me having to face something happening to him or him doing something to break my heart. These dreams have made me feel conflicted with reality. Either I wake up crying, not wanting to get out of bed, or I wake up in a rage, upset with him over something that didn't ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I feel like my kids as adults are losing respect for me. When your kids are young, they look up to you for everything and trust in you. My kids are all college age and older. They are leaving the nest and not looking back. They throw their bad memories as kids at me, saying that I was manipulative and a liar. But parents, we know...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter is coming of age, so to speak. She has a young man she likes, and they go out a bit. It all seems like normal high school stuff. But I know that they are at the age when one thing can turn into another very quickly. I have talked to her a lot about taking her time and not giving up the goods, if you know what I mean. ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband is OK with us having separate bank accounts, but he insists on sharing an Amazon Prime account. I feel like this is almost as invasive because he feels the need to confront me about what's on my wish list or in my shopping cart. This is the one of the reasons I did not want him to have my bank statement. Should I make ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend recently started taking Adderall to treat her ADHD. I'm very concerned for her. In the first month of her taking the medication, her weight has dropped drastically, and she is frequently agitated. When she told me about the medication, she didn't tell me all of the details. It wasn't until I did my own research ...Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a Black woman in my early 20s. One of my best friends is a white woman from the suburbs. We've been close since middle school. She and I get along so well because even though our backgrounds are completely different, she has always had a strong will to educate herself on other cultures, especially mine. She's incredibly woke....Read more

DEAR HARRIETTE: An older employee is getting credit for my work. He and I are both regularly required to do extensive research for interview subjects, but his research is never up to par. This employee has seniority over me, so I'm afraid to speak up about what's going on. He doesn't ever take full credit for the work that the two of us do ...Read more