Life Advice



Boss Gives Employee Too Much Work

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boss has no respect for my time. I am considered a junior executive at my company, and I have a long list of tasks that I am supposed to complete daily. However, whenever my boss needs something, she expects me to drop everything and attend to the issue of the moment. It is impossible for me to get all my work done when she is...Read more

Friend Gives Server A Bad Tip

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently started working in a restaurant in my town. The other day, I was excited to see that a friend of mine came by. I went out of my way to make sure she felt comfortable and had a great time. I gave her a bunch of freebies, too. In the end, she left me a skimpy tip. Should I confront her? -- Skimpy Tip

DEAR SKIMPY TIP: ...Read more

High School Senior Has Time-Management Issues

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm going into my senior year of high school, and I'm scared about all the stuff on my plate. On top of college applications, I'm enrolled in five A.P. courses, doing two internships and am an officer of four clubs. It's a lot. In years past, I've been really bad about procrastinating and getting my work done in an efficient ...Read more

Parents Act Clingy Toward High School-Age Child

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm a senior in high school this year, and my sister has just left for college. I've already noticed how my parents are becoming attached to me and wanting to spend more time together. They often interrupt me while I'm working and offer to take me out to lunch all the time. I understand that they are probably feeling lonely with ...Read more

Friend's Hotel Won't Release Security Deposit

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I stayed at my friend's family-owned bed and breakfast a while ago, and they still haven't refunded my security deposit. I called the front desk formally to ask about it, and they said to contact my bank. My bank said I need to contact the hotel. I'm getting the runaround. Should I confront my friend about this now? -- Friend's ...Read more

Neighbor Wants To Reach Out To Elderly Woman

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: My neighbor is an elderly woman who lives alone because her husband passed away a few years ago and her children live in a different state. We've never been close -- perhaps because my block isn't the friendliest. Nonetheless, I want to reach out to her and let her know that we are here if she wants to come over for dinner or ...Read more

Employee Feels Nervous About Going Back To Office

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: When the pandemic hit and we were all sent home, my job went remote. After about six months, I moved in with my parents because I couldn't afford my apartment in the city. Now, nearly two years later, my company is saying we all have to come back to the office in the fall. There's no firm date yet, but it will be soon. I don't ...Read more

Friends Won't Stay Out Of Reader's Relationship

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friends genuinely feel that because they do not like my boyfriend, I should consider leaving him. My boyfriend is great to me, but my friends question where he is going in his career. I sometimes question his career path as well, but we've been dating for only a few months, and I've seen major strides from him. How do I tell ...Read more

Friend Upset That Man Watches Earwax Removal Videos

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I was visiting with a good friend recently and noticed as he was looking at his phone that he had been watching ear wax removal videos. I asked him about it because it looked like he had a lot of these videos open. It seemed weird and kind of gross to me, and I really couldn't figure out why this seemingly normal guy would be ...Read more

Boss Won't Stop Hitting On Employee

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boss constantly hits on me, and it makes me extremely uncomfortable. I don't want to risk losing my job by complaining, but he's becoming too much. He's starting to do it in front of others, and it makes me not want to come in to work most days. I live alone, and I have to pay my bills, so I don't really know how to handle it....Read more

Mom Burnt Out Acting As Caregiver

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: My grandmother has been sick for about a year. She's slowly losing control of her body and mind. She's not capable of living alone as she can't walk much and shows early signs of dementia. She has a live-in caretaker. My mom often goes over there to spend time with her and provide social connection. However, every time my mom ...Read more

Harriette Reflects On The 20Th Anniversary Of 9/11

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR READERS: It's hard to believe that it has been 20 years since the world changed forever -- since those planes crashed into the World Trade Center in New York City, at the Pentagon and in Pennsylvania. All of us who were alive at the time have stories of exactly where we were and what we were doing when this hateful act of terror was ...Read more

Loving Partner Need Not Worry About Labels

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've been dating the same guy for a year now. I adore him, and I really enjoy spending time with him. We go to the movies and on walks together. We go out to dinner together and volunteer at a local hospital. We know each other's favorite foods and what to do when each other is sad. But we haven't said I love you yet. To me, it ...Read more

Adult Child Dislikes Way Dad Treats Mom

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: There are a lot of things that I do not like about my dad. He can be very condescending and a bit of a chauvinist. I do not like the way that he speaks to my mother. She is kind and gentle, and my dad talks to her as if she's some type of indentured servant. I'm married now, and I find myself sometimes speaking to my wife in a ...Read more

Former Bully Tries To Make Nice

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: A girl who used to go out of her way to be rude to me is now trying to be my friend on social media. I've never been one to hold a grudge, but I do remember how awful she used to make me feel for no reason at all. Do you think she may have ulterior motives by trying to befriend me all these years later? Could it be guilt? -- ...Read more

Man Never Dated Anyone Who Looks Like Fiancee

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently dug up some pictures of the women that my fiance dated before me. I couldn't help but notice that they look nothing like me. I'm a tall, full-figured Black woman, and every single girl he dated before me was petite and white. I'm now wondering how he could even be attracted to me if that was his type. Should I ask him ...Read more

Neighbor Won't Stop Extending Invitation

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: My neighbor has been asking to get together for dinner quite frequently. Each time I leave the house, it feels like she extends another invitation. I, however, don't really like her. I think she's mean and has questionable morals. I don't want to spend the evening with her or accept her invitation out of pity. I also don't want ...Read more

Boyfriend Owns No Formal Attire

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: My boyfriend told me he doesn't own a suit or dress shoes because he has never needed them. I suppose this makes sense in theory, but I just can't understand why a grown man wouldn't own any formal clothing. Even my 15-year-old brother owns a suit. Is this a red flag? -- Buy a Suit

DEAR BUY A SUIT: Rather than thinking of this ...Read more

Fit Older Woman Can Inspire, Not Discourage

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I just saw a post on social media from a woman I worked with years ago. Unlike me, she looks even healthier after the pandemic, social isolation and slothfulness that defined the past year-and-a-half for me. This woman is at least 75, and she looks 50. She had on a bathing suit, and her legs looked tight and lean. OK, yes, I am ...Read more

Trainee Receives Hateful Texts After Quitting

Life Advice / Sense & Sensitivity /

DEAR HARRIETTE: I quit a job on the first day of training. It was a restaurant job. The environment was so stressful and awful I could just tell it wasn't going to work out. The same day that I quit, I received a slew of hateful text messages from an unknown number; I'm assuming it was the girl who trained me. Should I go and say something to ...Read more



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