Life Advice

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Ask Amy: Former student reacts to race-based game

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: With knowledge comes broader perspective. I am a person of color. While studying for my Ph.D. in clinical psychology, I have realized that many things about my upbringing were wrong. In light of the social environment at the moment, the actions of one teacher hang heavy in my heart and mind.

In elementary school, we played a game in ...Read more

Ask Amy: Mom worries that dysfunction will follow kids

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I have two amazing teenage daughters.

They are mature, intelligent, and conscientious.

I'm very proud of them and look forward to seeing what they do in their lives, but this is also where my fear lies.

They have grown up witnessing an unhealthy codependent relationship between their father and me.

Although we are ...Read more

Ask Amy: Toddler-tornado makes a messy guest

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My wife and I recently bought a house and we have decided on a few rules to keep the place as clean as possible.

I invited my sister and her three kids to stay with us for the next two weeks, and while we already explained the house rules several times, the youngest child (he's 3), always manages to create a mess. I don't blame him (...Read more

Ask Amy: Woman wonders about ‘outing’ friend’s husband

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I’ve been friends with another woman since college. We are both middle-aged and married (to men).

Upon meeting her husband for the first time (years ago), I had the immediate sense that he may be homosexual or bisexual. There’s no defining thing, of course, but it was how he spoke to other men at the restaurant table, and a ...Read more

Ask Amy: New parents must set firm boundaries

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Late last year my husband and I had our first child, a son. We let people know that only immediate family members (the new grandparents and our siblings) would be allowed to visit us in the hospital the first day the baby was born. For the remainder of that week, we wanted privacy.

My husband’s family reacted with hostility, ...Read more

Ask Amy: Future husband sings a ‘me’ tune

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I want a woman’s perspective.

My soon-to-be wife is now hesitant to marry me because I want to live elsewhere during the winter.

I’m a 30-year-old business owner and my company doesn’t really do work from Christmas to March. My fiancee and I have talked about how I will go on a three-week mountain trip in Belize, followed by a ...Read more

Ask Amy: Family survivor doesn’t want to talk about it

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I was raised in a very dysfunctional family. My mother had psychological issues, my brother sexually molested me as a child (and remains a textbook sociopath), and my father had frequent outbursts of extreme rage.

My mother has been dead for 15 years. I ceased all interaction with my brother then. I continued trying to maintain a ...Read more

Ask Amy: Pandemic porch-drinking pal needs push

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Prior to the pandemic, I met up with an old friend of nearly 20 years three or four nights a week at a local watering hole. We would also watch football together on Sundays at my house.

When the pandemic hit, we all self-quarantined: Me with my college-aged daughter and him by himself. We kept in touch, and when I would order ...Read more

Ask Amy: Spouse wonders if church will hurt the marriage

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband of two years has recently become interested in exploring Christianity.

He went to church as a child, but stopped going when he was a teen. He is now very concerned about what will happen after he dies. He says he wants to find “peace.”

Amy, I have no interest in going with him. I was baptized, but I never went to ...Read more

Ask Amy: Pregnancy can’t stay a secret forever

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My partner and I are expecting a baby. It's our first baby, and the only grandchild in his family.

I moved in with him and his family right after we discovered that we were pregnant. The problem is that during this time, his parents’ relationship deteriorated, resulting in a messy divorce after 42 years.

We've decided that it was ...Read more

Ask Amy: Couple stuck in limbo over decision to have children

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I've only been married for a year, but my relationship has been far from a honeymoon experience.

Before marriage, my husband and I talked about children and I thought we were on the same page.

We discussed how we would raise our children and even considered a prenuptial agreement around our future children.

He mentioned that one of ...Read more

Ask Amy: Tragic loss brings on a strange family demand

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I lost my husband in a tragic accident a year ago. We had no children, so I'm alone now, but I am seeing a grief counselor.

For the past few months, my in-laws have been asking — or more like telling — me to move in with them as soon as COVID is over. Their logic is that they need me, and I shouldn't be alone right now.

I don't ...Read more

Ask Amy: October wedding creates a pandemic dilemma

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My daughter is scheduled to get married in October.

The state where the wedding is to take place has lifted all restrictions on these ceremonies.

She and her fiance will travel from their home state, which is currently a hot spot for COVID.

My daughter doesn’t want to put her life on hold. She doesn’t want to wait to have the ...Read more

Ask Amy: Working from home reveals unsavory habits

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Working at home during the pandemic has given me a glimpse into how my wife conducts business.

She is often rude to her customers and co-workers, with a particularly annoying habit of loudly talking over them to try and gain the verbal upper hand. She also frequently battles with her boss instead of trying to work to mutually ...Read more

Ask Amy: Aunt wonders if a violent abuser can change

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Several years ago, my niece's boyfriend pulled a gun on her and broke her cheekbone. I was horrified. I was even more horrified when my niece decided to have a baby with her abuser.

I made it known that I wasn't going to stick around the hospital room with this man when my niece had the baby. There was no way I could tolerate even ...Read more

Ask Amy: Marrying couple may have to dis-invite guests

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My fiance and I are getting married this fall. We will NOT be postponing the wedding.

Our venue is assuring us that we are on track and that our guest list of 150 will be allowed into the venue by then.

It’s getting close to the time when we have to mail invitations, and I’m worried about what to do if the social gathering ...Read more

Ask Amy: Stressed wife might need a ’she shed’

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have known my husband for almost 40 years. We’ve been married for 30 years.

I am trying to become healthier in body and mind. I practice yoga, and I am evolving and growing.

My husband chooses to do nothing to take care of his body; he eats whatever and whenever he wants, and has always chosen to be sedentary.

He just retired ...Read more

Ask Amy: Father-in-law’s rudeness might be medical

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My wife’s parents have been married for almost 40 years. My father-in-law recently told my wife that he plans to divorce my mother-in-law, and then move away. He has not told his wife yet, but his unhappiness is obvious, due to the rude comments he frequently makes to her.

He will openly criticize traits of hers that he doesn’t ...Read more

Ask Amy: Mother needs a border wall

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My 14-year-old daughter, “Carrie,” has been in both inpatient and outpatient care for years for mood disorders, anxiety, depression, and self-harm.

She also struggles with a binge-eating disorder and has become quite overweight. She is under the care of a pediatrician, pediatric psychiatrist and therapist. She is getting great ...Read more

Ask Amy: Daughter is caught in Dad’s needy net

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a 30-something daughter of divorced parents with two younger siblings. Our parents divorced 25 years ago.

Neither of my parents have healthy coping skills, but my father has really gotten extreme with his co-dependencies. He has always needed his children to constantly shower him with love and attention, specifically by spending ...Read more

 

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