Life Advice

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Ask Amy: Guilt about distance leads to more distance

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Growing up, I was close friends with a guy in the neighborhood. We remained close friends over the years, but as life happened, we drifted apart.

I stayed in the same town, while he moved more than 40 minutes away.

We got together for dinner every couple of months, but that habit faded, too.

After not hearing from him for a long ...Read more

Ask Amy: Neighbors not notified about a death on the street

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: “Ben” and “Sally” were neighbors of ours for 38 years.

We are the oldest residents on the street; the remaining properties have changed ownership several times.

Ben and Sally were somewhat reclusive, however when we met while walking, we enjoyed one another.

I was never in their home, but I was invited to one of their ...Read more

Ask Amy: Memorial service brings on acute anxiety

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My mother-in-law passed away last month.

I had asked my wife if she would be willing to delay her mother’s memorial service for three or four months until COVID recedes, but she and her siblings have decided to proceed with a memorial service next month.

My wife's Mom lived 2,000 miles away from us, so we would need to fly to the ...Read more

Ask Amy: Where there is a will, there is no way

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband's narcissistic father died by suicide three months ago. After over 25 years of our adult life dealing with his childish, nasty, out-of-proportion reactions to our lifestyle and family values, we created boundaries for him within our family.

It infuriated him that he could not control us with money in order to get us to ...Read more

Ask Amy: Cousin feels violated over childhood abuse

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: When I was a child, my female cousin, who is three years older than me, engaged me in sexual games/role-playing that I now realize were not at all age-appropriate.

She swore me to secrecy and praised me for being such a good cousin for keeping our secret. This abuse went on for almost three years.

We are now in our 30s, and when I ...Read more

Ask Amy: Mom’s needs must take a back seat

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My 57-year-old husband has stage 4 terminal pancreatic cancer.

This is a terrible time for our family.

My focus is on my husband and our two grown sons.

Then there is my narcissistic, manipulative mother.

She's been my focus for several years because of many health issues.

Her health is currently stable, and she's not getting the ...Read more

Ask Amy: New friendship takes an asexual turn

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I'm at a complete loss right now.

I am an asexual person in my late-30s. I am in a five-year relationship and am currently in school pursuing a degree.

About six weeks ago, another adult classmate of mine started pursuing a friendship with me (he has a wife and children). We've become really close during that time.

We talk about our...Read more

Ask Amy: This relationship really needs a payday

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am involved with a recently divorced man.

“Steve” has two children (both adults).

I have four children — also grown and out of the home.

Steve’s marriage was over before I met him.

Steve and I operate a small but very successful business together.

Here's the problem: Steve’s 19-year-old daughter works for us.

She gets...Read more

Ask Amy: Baby shower brings on infantile behavior

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My son and daughter-in-law are expecting their first baby.

The plans for a baby shower have been in the works for months, with an outside venue, food, desserts, decor, etc.

Everything was paid in advance by myself and my daughter-in-law’s mother, “Bertie.”

The night before the baby shower, Bertie tested positive for COVID-19 ...Read more

Ask Amy: Online match wants to show up at the office

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I'm a 43-year-old never-married man who was matched and connected online with a 50-year-old woman who was married for 30 years and has several children and grandchildren.

We have been texting back in forth for a couple of months but have not yet met in person.

I have scheduled several dates, and at the last minute she has had to ...Read more

Ask Amy: Unreliable parent leaves guilty legacy

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I grew up with a mom who I could never trust to reliably "show up.”

She was an alcoholic until I was 7, and I was sent back and forth between my father and her while she went through relationships with several men.

She had a sober period from when I was 7 until I was 13, and then she remarried and had two more children.

Once I ...Read more

Ask Amy: Home loan leaves couple home alone

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I have been building a house. We signed a contract after returning from our honeymoon.

I make a quarter of what he makes (in the nonprofit sector), and I have lived frugally in hopes of having my own home someday.

My husband owns his own home, so he’s bringing the equity from the sale of that home to the purchase of ...Read more

Ask Amy: Couple’s age differential brings on questions

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Our 24-year-old daughter recently moved out of state, before entering grad school in the medical field.

After graduation from college a year and a half ago, she worked in a rehab hospital, where she made many friends.

She became close to one of her co-workers and it seemed like they had a strong friendship. We have met him on several...Read more

Ask Amy: Mom ‘unmasks’ some schoolchildren

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My 8-year-old daughter, “Jasmine,” started in-person school this fall.

The other day, while waiting to pick her up, I started chatting with the mother of one of Jasmine’s close friends.

This parent confided in me that she had been sending her own daughter to school wearing a mesh mask, so that her child could “finally breathe...Read more

Ask Amy: Relatives aren’t thankful for political discord

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I are in our late-60s. We have no children.

We are usually invited by nieces and nephews to join them for Thanksgiving dinner.

My problem concerns my brother, “Jack,” who inevitably brings up topics that we do not agree with (he believes that COVID is just a mild flu, vaccines are not useful, the last election was ...Read more

Ask Amy: Friend’s husband is a bull in her china shop

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I are retired. We have a good life in a city that we moved to about seven years ago.

We’ve been able to make lots of new friends. I'm so pleased by the variety of people in our friend group.

What I'm not pleased about is that one of my dearest women friends, “Meg,” has a husband, “Mike,” who seems to insert ...Read more

Ask Amy: Distanced family visit causes heartache

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My wife and I recently visited our cross-border family for the first time since COVID struck. We insisted on no vaccine protocols for my wife’s family, even though the unvaccinated children are all in school.

We only applied a protocol to my mother, who is unvaccinated, but also extremely insular (she is the guardian to three ...Read more

Ask Amy: Dad is stealing son’s medical pot

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My 30-year-old son “Danny” lives with me and my husband because he has serious health problems.

Danny works full time and has a medical cannabis card. He purchases marijuana every week.

About a year ago, I discovered that my healthy husband has been stealing marijuana from my son's bedroom and has been using it regularly.

Danny ...Read more

Ask Amy: Relationship is in receivership

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I dated my boyfriend for 18 months before deciding to move in with him.

I’m in my 60s and he is in his early 70s.

When I moved in, he gave me his credit card. He said that I was to write down what I spent, and then we would each pay half of the total.

The plan was to move in together into a townhouse that he was building.

He said...Read more

Ask Amy: Irish dancing leads to an uncomfortable jig

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Last night, my girlfriend and I were in a pub enjoying some Irish music. A man came over and asked if he could “borrow” my girlfriend. I told him that I didn’t own her, and it was up to her.

He proceeded to lead her to the band area (where no one else was dancing).

She didn’t want to dance with him, pulled away from his grip,...Read more

 

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