Life Advice

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Ask Amy: Donor-conceived children should be told

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have read advice in your column suggesting that it is wisest to tell children about their adoption starting very young.

My six-year-old twin grandchildren have never been told that their momma’s eggs came from an egg donor.

The parents are now divorced but are very friendly.

Should they tell the kids?

Their momma carried them ...Read more

Ask Amy: Parents want to give daughter a nudge

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My daughter is 34 years old, single, with no children. She’s intelligent and well educated.

Six months ago, she quit her job in another state and moved into our house. We welcomed her, but it was supposed to be temporary.

She seemed reluctant to come here to begin with, saying that she didn’t want to intrude into our lives. ...Read more

Ask Amy: Special needs child really needs good uncles

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have a 9-year-old special needs child. “Kyle” is high-functioning on the autism spectrum, but doesn’t do well with athletics and other “typical” settings that might help a child fit in, make friends, and otherwise have a functional childhood dynamic.

We worry that he is becoming more socially isolated. We are very engaged ...Read more

Ask Amy: Family vacation might be riled by new spouse

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband, kids, and I live in a different state than most of my family.

We are planning a trip to my family's state and would like to invite my parents and grandmothers to rent a cabin for a few nights.

I don't see my grandmothers often as they are not well enough to travel too far.

I want to be able to enjoy a wonderful and ...Read more

Ask Amy: Husband snoops on wife’s private writing

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I'm asking you to weigh in.

My husband thinks that it's fair game to read my computer or phone screen over my shoulder, even when I'm clearly writing or viewing something private.

I've asked him many times over the years not to do this, but he refuses to stop reading my screens. He definitely doesn’t like it when I do it to him.

...Read more

Ask Amy: Single mom wrestles with tough choices

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a 32-year-old woman with a 6-year-old son.

I am in a relationship with “Larry,” who is 48. He is not my child's father.

Before meeting Larry, I lived alone and raised my son by myself.

After losing my job, my son and I moved in with my folks. We were financially dependent on them. Over the course of a year I looked for work...Read more

Ask Amy: Mom wants to keep news of first child a secret

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Fifty-five years ago, when I was young and stupid, I had a child out of wedlock and placed the baby up for adoption.

Fast-forward to now. I am married to a different man and have a 48-year-old daughter and a 38-year-old son.

I have two grandchildren. My husband knows about my indiscretion, but it never comes up in discussion.

...Read more

Ask Amy: Sister wonders how to fix flawed sibling

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My younger sister is 54. She has been divorced three times and has a teenage daughter.

Both of our parents are deceased. My sister currently has a nice boyfriend she has lived with for a few years.

The issue is that she cannot seem to keep a job for longer than a year. She has been terminated from at least six jobs (that I can count)...Read more

Ask Amy: Sober friend worries about friend’s enabling

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a recovering alcoholic, currently celebrating seven years of sobriety.

A dear friend of over 30 years, “Brett,” is in a relationship with an alcoholic woman named “Emily.”

Brett has rescued Emily from drunk-driving accidents before the police arrived. He has picked her up from work for being drunk at lunchtime. The list ...Read more

Ask Amy: Grandson’s name causes angst for grandma

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My youngest daughter recently gave birth to her first child, a beautiful baby boy (our fourth grandchild but first grandson).

I am having difficulty with the baby’s chosen name.

His first name, “Louis,” is after the baby’s father, and a family name — so he is the fourth male to be named that. I find it confusing and ...Read more

Ask Amy: Both giving and receiving bring trouble

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: After many years of exchanging gifts with my brother-in-law and his wife, my husband and I decided we didn’t want to do it anymore.

We are trying to get rid of things. We have too much stuff!

The gifts were getting more extravagant and some we didn’t even like or use (and gifts we had given them ended up in their garage sale, so ...Read more

Ask Amy: Gal pals show their mean side

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Recently I have been out with a couple of different “gal pals” who openly and loudly ridiculed people in public who were significantly overweight/obese.

With several family members who fight weight problems, it really galls me.

In the first instance, I was so taken aback I could not reply; in the second situation, I briefly ...Read more

Ask Amy: Dad wants eviction, not connection

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My girlfriend and I have been together for over 10 years and have three kids together, ages 7, 4, and 2 years old. Once our first was born, I gave up going out and drinking — no complaints.

I feel like the kids are well taken care of. However, her moodiness and spending habits have gotten worse. I generally don't complain about it,...Read more

Ask Amy: True friends are worth freezing for

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: “Allie” and I became friends when our children were young. We celebrated holidays, vacationed together, and shared in our joys and troubles.

Allie is ambitious, friendly, and very extroverted, while I am quiet and introverted. It's natural that she has a larger circle of friends, most of whom I have also known for years. She's ...Read more

Ask Amy: Young nephew’s behavior causes concern

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I’m a clueless aunt looking for some advice.

My little nephew (age 4 1/2) is very smart, but seems dysregulated quite often.

He often runs around in small circles for about 10 minutes screaming, and can only focus for very short amounts of times, avoids eye contact, and often does not respond when spoken to directly.

We recently ...Read more

Ask Amy: Lovebirds encounter a serious red light

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I were lovebirds in college. We had so much in common!

Unfortunately, an autoimmune disease hit him when he was in good shape and he lost most of the sensation in his body.

At the age of 37 he worked with an unusual paleo diet and conducted lots of internet research. He is now stronger and healthier than before the ...Read more

Ask Amy: A writer shares, but her reader refuses

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a self-supporting working woman.

Over the past decades, I've written personal essays for various publications. I don't make money at this; I wish I could!

I have a portfolio full of my work. Some pieces are humorous; some are serious.

I moved to a new town three years ago and made a new friend. She was going on a long car ride,...Read more

Ask Amy: Loved dog leaves a legacy of guilt behind

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: The dog I had for over 10 years recently had to be euthanized.

I loved my dog, but being a pet owner often made me feel guilty. I often felt that I had to choose between being with our dog or being a good mother to my kids.

I realize that I was not ready to own a pet when I first got her. I made many blunders that I still regret to ...Read more

Ask Amy: Future family visit is rapid-tested

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My mom has invited me, my husband, and our two teenagers to her home for a special occasion dinner.

Our household, and my mom, have all been vaccinated and boosted for COVID.

My brother, who does not live with our mom and has no underlying conditions, is also vaccinated and boosted, but wants us to take a rapid test before arriving (...Read more

Ask Amy: Volatile relationship benefits from separation

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a 35-year-old professional woman, recently separated from my husband of nine years.

Our marriage has been rife with volatility due to his uncontrollable anger and my tumultuous relationship with alcohol during our relationship.

That being said, we have worked through most of our issues. He’s my best friend.

I’m in therapy ...Read more

 

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