Life Advice


Health & Spirit

Supportive friend now needs same

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: For about six years, I have been the phone support for someone in remission from stage four cancer. She was a friend who included me in this tough and sad news from the first.

Her personal situation includes not only her illness, but an autistic child at home, as well as a husband who is bipolar. All of this is further complicated by ...Read more

Man is cast in Tennessee Williams domestic drama

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a 72-year-old (divorced) man. Four years ago, I met my widowed girlfriend (age, 70). After dating for over a year, she asked me to move in and live with her in her spacious house, where her sister (age, 64) also lives.

"Sister" suffers from severe clinical depression, and is on medication and medical care.

I accepted my ...Read more

Sisters don't want to go on annual family vacation

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Every year, our aunts, uncles and cousins plan a yearly "European family vacation."

The "Reunion Committee" sends out an "invitation newsletter" informing family members about the location, venues, etc., and after each vacation they always send a follow-up newsletter about how much fun they had, where they went, what they ate, etc.

...Read more

Grieving parent wonders how to respond

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I'm wondering how to respond to people inquiring about your children when one of them died in the not-too-distant past.

My 35-year-old daughter died last summer, after a hellish battle with cancer. We are all, of course, still struggling with grief, though we've had great support and the impacts are diminishing over time.

My struggle...Read more

Cat ownership causes couple's concerns

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I've started to realize that I should probably rehome my cat. I adopted her four years ago when she was a kitten and she helped me to adjust to living on my own in a new city.

My fiance is allergic and "not a cat person." My cat is very rambunctious, gets into everything and likes to test authority. Having my fiance in the household ...Read more

Dad wants new wife and kids to meet

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a father with two adult children from a 25-year marriage that ended six years ago.

I got remarried 18 months ago to a woman that my adult children suspect ended my marriage to their mother (in reality, there were huge issues with my marriage of 25 years).

I accepted that my adult children would have nothing to do with the woman ...Read more

Child wants to call parents' partners 'mom' and 'dad'

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My ex and I have been separated for a year, and divorced for three months. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost a year.

My 7-year-old daughter asked if she could call him "Daddy."

I told her no. I explained that she has one mom and one dad, and that when we get remarried one day she will have a bonus mom and dad.

Well, ...Read more

DNA testing reveals shocking results

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I recently found out through a DNA test that the man I thought was my father for more than 60 years is not my biological father. The DNA test also revealed that I have a half-sister.

I do not want to be associated with this family and have decided not to communicate this new information with any of them.

I have several siblings with ...Read more

Parents wonder if drunk gran is fit babysitter

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I are new parents of a 5-month-old son. Over a month ago we left the baby with my in-laws for a few hours to have a date night. When we returned that night, my mother-in-law, who was supposed to be the baby's primary caretaker for the evening, was drunk (well past the point of being tipsy).

I have seen my MIL drunk ...Read more

To combat addiction, try a social media 'fast'

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have realized lately, after years of denial, that I am addicted to my smartphone and to social media.

Sometimes it gets to the point where I can't even watch a movie without needing to be on my phone, checking every social media account as I watch the movie.

The odd thing is that even when there is nothing new and I've scrolled ...Read more

Adult education class leads to childish behavior

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I teach an adult education class in a very culturally, racially and ethnically diverse community.

One of my (foreign-born) students has recently brought to my attention some very negative and hurtful comments she has received from another of my students.

She says this other student has said to her, "Why are you here?" "Aren't you ...Read more

Bitter child torn about confronting father

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My mother died 10 years ago. My father, "Lucifer," started dating "Rebecca" within a week of my mom's funeral.

After two years, my father informed me that he was going to disinherit my brother and me in favor of "Rebecca" and her three spawn.

I begged my father not to do this, and told him he'd never see me or my kids again if he ...Read more

Adult daughter criticizes mom -- for everything

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I need some help with my oldest daughter. I divorced their father when my girls were under the age of five. My ex was an alcoholic and heavy smoker who was -- at best -- spotty with child support.

I was a great earner and provided for the girls. We had dinner together every night and I never missed an activity. Their father died three...Read more

Long-buried secret resurfaces when principals die

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: A year after my mother died, I woke up to the sounds of my father and my married aunt (my mother's sister) having sex in the living room.

I was 17 at the time and had to go to school the next morning. I was panicked that I would run across my aunt when leaving, since she was now in my father's bedroom down the short hall from my room....Read more

Should son of abusive father try to reconcile?

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband, "Steven," was raised by an abusive father. He received regular beatings and humiliation (in front of his friends) as punishment. He was not a bad kid. His mother stood by passively and did nothing about it.

Steven had two siblings who were not treated badly. As an adult, his mom and dad continued to "put him in his place" ...Read more

Old friendship is hotbed of problems and advice

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have lifelong buddy in his 50s. He had a few emotional/family/divorce issues a decade ago and he basically checked out of life. He stopped maintaining his home and business and let his health go. There were years of dysfunctional behavior, borderline hoarding, a bad diet, a disastrous relationship -- all of these things overwhelmed ...Read more

Husband is anguished over wife's long-ago assault

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My wife and I have been happily married for 26 years. We have raised two terrific daughters. I continue to struggle with an event that happened while we were still dating.

While at a business conference, my wife (girlfriend at the time) was sexually assaulted by a client.

She was concerned about the impact on her career, her ...Read more

Boyfriend wants to leave it in Vegas

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My boyfriend of two and a half years told me that he wants to have a "drunken one-night-stand" in Las Vegas.

What should I do?

-- Upset Girlfriend

Dear Upset: I'm assuming from your question that your boyfriend wants to have a drunken one-night-stand in Vegas with someone other than you.

The desire to have an encounter without ...Read more

Landlord has become way too handy toward tenant

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I have been married for 40 years. He owns rental property, and last year a married woman moved into one of his houses. Her husband lives out of town and is expected to move here once he retires.

A few months ago, she and my husband began an affair. I don't believe it was sexual, but it was definitely emotional.

Once he...Read more

Grandparents want alone-time with the grandkids

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: We live out of town from our son, daughter-in-law and our three precious grandchildren. We fly to their town monthly to see them.

Our daughter-in-law's mother lives around the corner. She is divorced and her life is completely devoted to her daughter, our son and the grandchildren.

She has no boundaries and gives us no time alone ...Read more

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