On every page of your daily calendar, write the following: "If it's 7 p.m. and I'm still at my desk, go home!" Write the same message on slips of red paper tucked into your purse or wallet -- and any other place they'll be noticed. But writing notes is one thing; following through is what takes guts.
Carve out time in your daily routine for ...Read more
The unmarried are in the middle of a global revolution, largely unheralded by our media, that has, with unerring grace and dignity, moved most of the world's developed countries to adopt laws giving them broad protection and rights. It is sad irony that America, heralded for its pioneering spirit and respect for human rights, is still woefully ...Read more
And why not? Why can't a nurturing father share parenting or be equally allowed to parent his child? Before you come down on one side of the issue, give the following letter room to make a dent in your preconception of male parenting. Ready? Deep breath, generous exhale.
DEAR SUSAN: I'm not quite sure when I got this vision that I wanted to be ...Read more
Sexual expression is part of mental and physical well-being. On that we probably agree. And being unmarried, you know how difficult it is to find a caring and committed partner. It's well worth waiting for, because when soul mates join spirit and flesh, their union can approach spiritual communion. Once that's experienced, anything less is out ...Read more
Zen teachings include a lesson on the sound of one hand clapping. For Buddhists, that leads to deep and provocative wisdom, definitely instructive as a life lesson but not where we're going here. In a less lofty (but more realistic) world, where give-and-take is the name of the game, both hands must be clapping to create the sound of true love. ...Read more
Feminism is changing. The vitality that made sisters of us all, women tethered to one another by indignation and conviction, is becoming more personal. The battle for equal partnership is being waged in corporate offices, day care centers, private homes -- no longer by bra-burning mobs in public squares -- and it will ultimately be won by women ...Read more
DEAR SUSAN: It's love this time; I'm sure of it. Can you explain what love does and how it makes me feel as if I'm a whole person? -- From the "Single File" blog
DEAR BLOGGER: Love is my favorite subject, the phenom that takes over our life and brings out the best in us. Suddenly, the sun is shining even on a rainy day, and we feel fulfilled. ...Read more
My son's thoughts have a deep influence on my life. His innate wisdom now reaches an audience beyond America -- through YouTube and private sessions -- and is increasingly valued as this world becomes more complex. Consider his words concluding my book "Single File."
"It is quite unusual for the son of an author to write the epilogue for a book...Read more
Should a woman pop the question? Darn right she should. And now you know why men wait and wait and wait -- until they're 100% sure they'll get a "yes" answer. And you? I bet you'll have a headache and a touch of queasiness just thinking about it, but make something happen! You will feel really good about making the first move. Promise.
There ...Read more
If only we women could be more secure about our age (and our wrinkles) and get comfortable with the idea of being with a younger man. Europeans have been onto the arrangement (unashamedly) for years. When will we get the message? After all, young men have vitality, enthusiasm, passion and a far more flexible viewpoint toward the female gender. ...Read more
If you've been musing on the power of bitterness and the awfulness it can play in a life, that's a step in the right direction. It tells me your complacency has been a bit rattled by my words and you may just be considering (for the first time?) your role in shaping the unpleasant endings in your life. Knowing this is just between you and me, ...Read more
Of all the aftershocks of love's endings, bitterness does the most damage because it's sneaky. While it clouds perception, it silently fulfills its own prophecy, which is that people will stay away. Potential friends and lovers keep their distance from an embittered person, which only serves to confirm his/her sour view of life, completing the ...Read more
There I was, sitting in the middle of a good-sized amphitheater, guest guru for a large Seattle group of singles assembled for a local television show. The young host had me on the hot seat. I was the central focus for questions from the audience. All was going smoothly, when from the back row came a plaintive cry: "My wife died last month, and ...Read more