Life Advice
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Don't Complicate Things: Just Say 'hi'
DEAR MISS MANNERS: What is the proper greeting of a childless woman or man on Mother's Day or Father's Day?
GENTLE READER: "Hello."
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a woman member of a mostly male international wine society, and I enjoy tweaking the men's noses. I can't and won't deny it.
I'd very much like to buy some 18-button gloves, with the ...Read more
The Impact of Good-Mannered Children
Dear Annie: You recently said you rarely get letters praising mothers-in-law. Well, here is one!
I grew up in an abusive family with a mother who has severe borderline personality disorder and refuses to get medication or therapy. When I met my mother-in-law, I was naturally very distrustful of her. Mothers were not safe to me, and mothers-in...Read more
Ask Amy: A 50-year lie needs to be corrected
Dear Amy: For the past 50 years, I have lied that I was in the military and served in Vietnam.
I'm now 71. I want to come clean with my son/family.
I ran away from a bad home life at 13 and lived on the streets. It was horrible. I was beaten up and sexually attacked. I tried to commit suicide twice.
My self-esteem was so low for many years. ...Read more
Relative's Gifts Choices Are Unwanted And Annoying
DEAR ABBY: I'm a 77-year-old woman with a 27-year-old granddaughter who loves electronic gadgets and toys. She's comfortable financially and often buys expensive gifts for me. While I appreciate her generosity and her desire to make my life "easier and more fun," I simply am NOT INTERESTED in them.
I find these devices more frustrating than ...Read more
Yikes! You're stuck in a situationship. When to stick around or get out
LOS ANGELES — Meagan Culberson, 32, was on a third date with a guy she met on Hinge when she decided it was time to ask him a make-or-break question: What are you looking for?
They'd gone on fun dates and she was interested in getting to know him better, but only if they were on the same page. She wanted a long-term relationship.
When she ...Read more
Friends Struggle To Reconcile After Falling Out
DEAR HARRIETTE: I had a huge falling out with one of my best friends. We hadn't spoken for about three months until the other day, when we got together to talk. We shed a lot of tears and spoke our minds about what happened between us, but we didn't find resolution. I walked away feeling like I was being blamed for something that I don't think ...Read more
Uneaten Desserts Won't Go To Waste
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was at a friend's for dinner. There were seven of us all together, and the host and hostess are quite formal.
A little background to set the mood: We sat outside by the pool, and the table was set with starched linens, lovely china, crystal and sterling silver flatware, along with beautiful candles and fresh flowers. Each ...Read more
Grandparent Problems and Communication Challenges
Dear Annie: I've been reading more and more of your stories and enjoying them. But the one that really caught my eye is from "Heartbroken Nana," the woman who wants to have a better relationship with her grandchildren.
I am a grandmother of soon-to-be 15 grandchildren, and I am in daily contact with four of them. I take them to school and ...Read more
Ask Amy: Divorcing dad needs to put son first
Dear Amy: My wife and I are divorcing after 23 years of marriage. I am moving out soon.
We have a 21-year-old son.
I talked with him about it, and while he’s angry, he says he understands.
The problem, however, is that my marriage was bad for a very long time, and I fell in love with another woman.
My wife refers to me as an adulterer. ...Read more
Millionaire Son Who Never Pays Calls His Father Cheap
DEAR ABBY: When we are out as a family, my 30-year-old, millionaire son never pays for anything. He eats more than any of us and never reaches for his wallet, not even to help with the tip. This has been going on for years, and my wife always defends him. I have given up trying to fix it.
I'm writing because my son never fails to criticize the ...Read more
Caught in a Complex Connection
Dear Annie: I'm sad to say that my mother has been lonely for far too long. Her relationship with my father was unsatisfying, and they separated years before his untimely death 18 years ago. Since then, she has neither dated nor maintained any close friendships. My brother lives nearby and sees her a few times a month with his toddler son.
I ...Read more
Ask Amy: A crowded house needs fewer residents
Dear Amy: I've been dating my boyfriend for the past year. I brought my pets and we moved in with him this past December. He's an amazing guy – the absolute best!
The issue arises with his house. He owns a three-bedroom house.
Last July his sister and her family moved in with him.
This took the total number of people from two adults, three ...Read more
Divorcee Wonders If Any 'Good' Men Are Out There
DEAR ABBY: I am sad that I haven't found a long-lasting husband. I'm divorced, and my previous relationships and marriage look like intentional hits. I'm not sure what brought this on. I'm in my 40s and I still would like a man in my life. The men I've met all seem to enjoy having their homes to themselves. It's kind of frightening.
Some female...Read more
Woman With New Job Losing Touch With Friends
DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my closest friends recently landed a new job that pays significantly better than the positions held by the rest of our friend group. While I'm genuinely happy for her success, her behavior since starting this job has been a cause for concern. Ever since she got this job, she's developed an air of superiority. She ...Read more
Old Love Letters Lead To Bad Ideas
DEAR MISS MANNERS: While cleaning out my mom's attic after she passed, I found love letters from my old girlfriends from 50 years ago -- well before I married my wife of 40 years. I read the letters and then tossed them, as I really didn't want my wife or kids to see them.
I've had a great life, but have always held these women in my heart, as ...Read more
Pet Disparity Puts Strain on Marriage
Dear Annie: I grew up never allowed to have pets. I've been married almost 30 years to a man who allowed me to have a small inside dog, and he doesn't mind her so much but hates the two we have outside. Both are rescues, one from his oldest son that had him tied to a tree, the other from a rescue group. Both weigh under 7 pounds. He hates them...Read more
Ask Amy: Divorced mom is debt-averse
Dear Amy: I am a divorced mom in my early-30’s, with primary custody of my 8-year-old child.
I have been dating “Ben” for the past two years. He is a great guy and he is very good with my son.
We have been talking about getting married. He has never been married before (no kids) and I am gun-shy, to say the least.
I own my home, my son ...Read more
Felon's Impending Release Sparks Angst Among Family
DEAR ABBY: My boyfriend, "Will," and I have been together for seven years. We get along great. I love his close-knit family and adore his parents. He's the youngest of five brothers, most of whom I get along with great. The only brother I don't know is the oldest. "Rick" has been incarcerated for the better part of 30 years for rape. I've always...Read more
Sister Chooses To Spend Time With New Boyfriend
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm feeling a bit lost and hurt lately because my sister, who used to be my closest friend, seems to have disappeared since getting into a relationship with her new boyfriend. She's been spending all of her time with him, leaving little room for our sisterly bond. I am not the only one who feels this way; she has also pushed away...Read more
Host Won't Share Breakfast With Guest
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am 25 and am lucky to be studying overseas in France. It is a financial struggle, but worth the effort, I think.
I don't splurge on much of anything; I can't, really. But I do indulge my love of breakfast. I will go out in the morning and buy a single buttery croissant, a bit of jam, some rich cheese, a few pieces of fruit ...Read more
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