Life Advice

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Health & Spirit

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Person to Person: Cooling employee burnout helps the bottom line

Life Advice / Helping Yourself /

Do your employees or co-workers seem bogged down and unmotivated? Are they taking longer to finish routine projects, or do they make too many excuses about why they can't keep up with the workload?

If so, these individuals may be wrestling with burnout. In today's complex society, we all deal with dozens of issues in our personal lives before...Read more

Brother With Repeat Offenses Doesn't Merit Sister's Support

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: My brother is older than I am and has been in and out of prison. He has stolen my things and pawned them.

I am married, and my husband and I are expecting our first child. We live in a time zone several hours behind the one my family is in. I am now receiving phone calls at 4 o'clock in the morning from collection agencies on the ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 4/27/2015

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: Two years ago, I made a big mistake. I married a widower and agreed to move into his house in a large city that is a 30-minute drive from the small town I love living in.

I now realize that I absolutely hate living in the city and, more importantly, living in the home that he and his late wife picked out and decorated together. ...Read more

Ultimatums vs. Standards

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

I've always been confused about the difference between issuing an ultimatum and saying, like, "I can't live with [behavior] any longer, and if it doesn't change or improve, I won't stay." Aren't those kind of the same thing?

My spouse and I are going through a rough time. Spouse has ...Read more

Nonstop Talkers Take A Toll On Those Stuck Listening

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: I have noticed that some people in my age group (60s) are becoming compulsive talkers. These people don't ask questions of those around them. When someone begins to speak, the compulsive talker interrupts, usually in a louder voice and returns to dominating the conversation. Some of them continue to ramble on even when no one is ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 4/26/2015

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: Several years ago, my then middle-aged husband worked for a company that employed several young attractive girls. He became friends with one of them, and they became texting buddies. Even when they both later left the company, they continued to text. I found this out after the fact. When I confronted him, he said they were "just ...Read more

Mean Comments by Sibling

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Hi, Carolyn:

Two weeks ago, my sister and brother-in-law said some horrible things about childless people -- apparently forgetting that my husband and I, who have no children, were in the same room.

Collective jaws dropped. My husband and I excused ourselves. Other family members came to our defense, and let them know how truly crappy they ...Read more

Trauma In Teen's Past Is A Secret She Should Keep

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 16-year-old girl, just starting to dip my toes into the dating scene. It's not that I haven't wanted a boyfriend in the past, but I live in a rural area where options are few.

I am becoming close with a guy who lives near me, and I care a lot about him. Therein lies the problem. We're getting to the point where we are finding ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 4/25/2015

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: I am so sad watching the devastating effect that parental alienation is having on my grandchildren, and I feel powerless to help them.

My daughter is the target of an ex-husband who is determined to turn their children against their mother. My 13-year-old granddaughter attempted suicide last week and went to a facility for several ...Read more

Honeymoon Registry

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Hi Carolyn:

I'm hoping you can calm my panic: I just got the "save the date" for my brother's wedding, and it has directions to their "wedding website" -- which is a "fund our honeymoon" page! My parents are backpacking outside of cell service, but I have to imagine if they had known about this they ...Read more

Timing Is Right For Plastic Surgery, But Parents Object

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: I am 23 years old, working full-time as a teacher and I'm about to move out of my parents' house. I have decided to have breast augmentation surgery, and I know the best time to do it would be this summer so I'll have time to recover before school starts.

The problem is my parents are adamantly against my having this surgery. I've ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 4/24/2015

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: My husband died 11 years ago. Our son, "Marcus," was 6 at the time. His dad was in intensive care for two months, and because of his young age, our son was not allowed to see his father.

Before he died, my husband asked his younger brother to keep his drum set until Marcus turned 18. Marcus' uncles used to call him every year on his...Read more

Drifting Between Continents

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

My boyfriend and I, both 30, have been dating for five years. We are from different countries, and currently live in a country foreign to both of us. He recently told me he cannot imagine living anywhere else other than his home country. This surprised me, as he had sung a different tune in the past.

While it would be ...Read more

Resentment Is The Thanks Mom Gets For Helping Son's Family

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: My son, Rick, and daughter-in-law, Amy, seem to really dislike me. I try to be kind and not pry, but they live with me and it can make for a full house. They have had job difficulties and work injuries that brought them back to my home. Her parents don't care for my son, so living there was not an option.

Amy does not help at all ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 4/23/2015

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: Last week, our son came home from high school and told us that a boy at his school had killed himself. The boy had been a friend of his since the fifth grade.

The school had a moment of silence over the public address system, but never mentioned the boy's name. Most of the details about the suicide are nonexistent, although there ...Read more

Horrified

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Adapted from a recent online discussion.

Dear Carolyn:

About a month ago I caught my mother being physically and verbally abusive to my kids, whom she had been watching daily while I work from home. After we fought about it, she left my home, and I haven't seen or talked to her since.

I'm horrified, both by her actions and that it took me ...Read more

Girl Who Lost Her Virginity Must Learn To Protect Herself

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: I'm a 17-year-old girl. Last weekend I lost my virginity in the back seat of a stranger's car. I feel guilty about it and I haven't told anyone. I'm not sure if he has.

I need some advice on whether I should be making a big deal out of it, or just ignore it and move on. -- ANXIOUS IN OHIO

DEAR ANXIOUS: Please don't ignore it. You ...Read more

Annie's Mailbox for 4/22/2015

Life Advice / Annie's Mailbox /

Dear Annie: I am a 59-year-old woman. Two years ago, I met this guy, "Jake," and had feelings for him from a distance. We finally got together one night at a club. We exchanged phone numbers and then talked for about two months.

Jake invited me to his place, and we made love. For the next several months, that was the pattern -- I'd go to his ...Read more

Keeping an Ex-Husband's Name

Life Advice / Carolyn Hax /

Dear Carolyn:

When a woman marries a man, it is usually love. If she decides to take his last name as her unhyphenated surname, has no children from the marriage and then decides to divorce her once-enamored because she no longer loves him, or for other reasons -- WHY does she keep his name?

-- A.

Because her maiden name was ...Read more

Readers Have Strong Views On Claiming Seats In Church

Life Advice / Dear Abby /

DEAR ABBY: May I comment on your response to Got Here First in Pennsylvania (Jan. 7), who asked whether someone sitting at the end of a church pew should move if someone comes and says it's his or her favorite seat?

There are many reasons why people remain sitting at the end of a pew: an allergy to perfumes can be overwhelming if you're sitting...Read more