Life Advice

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Erika Ettin: 'I hate dating!'

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

I was talking to a potential client recently who had signed up for a consultation call through my website. She told me that one of her friends had worked with me a few years ago. She’s in her late-60s, lives in New York City, is accomplished, and wants to find a partner now that she’s been divorced for a number of years… and COVID really ...Read more

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Barton Goldsmith: Lessons my pets have taught me

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Quadrupeds are great companions, but they are much more than that. These days they are our “fur babies,” and along with the unconditional love they naturally give, they also have a few things to teach us.

Here are some lessons I have learned from the wonderful animals in my life.

-- I am happiest when walking. If I absorb my dog’s high ...Read more

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This couple fell for one another singing. Now they're celebrating their 70th anniversary

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BOISE, Idaho — When Gloria Flister and Edward Skurzynski were dating back in Duquesne, Pennsylvania, a steel town on the Monongahela River, they'd go into the hills surrounding the small town.

They watched as molten slag from the Duquesne (pronounced doo-kane) Works, home of the world's largest blast furnace, Dorothy Six, was brought by rail ...Read more

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How to break up like a grown-up during the holidays

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Dec. 11 is statistically the most common day of the year to break off a romantic relationship. Yes, people have done legitimate math on this.

I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ve been dumped — twice — on Christmas Eve. In both cases, the guys did it via email. One said he’d found someone else; the other straight up admitted his desire to ...Read more

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Erika Ettin: You're not 'still single'

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A client sent me a text recently asking, “Can I ask you? Why am I still single? In your opinion? Maybe I’m not putting enough effort in? I want love to find me! Arghhh!”

I actually get questions like this more often than one might think.

I replied, “This sounds like a question that can’t be answered over text! You’ve obviously had...Read more

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Barton Goldsmith: The search for inspiration

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We all want to feel inspired in our lives, and it’s good to get into the habit of seeking inspiration rather than expecting it to find you.

As a writer, I am always looking for new things to write about. The ideas that come seemingly out of nowhere are always the best, of course. I love writing from that place where my heart and head are one ...Read more

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Barton Goldsmith: 5 ways to sweeten and deepen the love between you

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You can show your love in a million or so ways. Here are a few more to help you deepen and sweeten your relationship. You may already be doing some of these. If not, pick one or two and see how it goes.

1. Share what you both love best. I play guitar and sing a bit, and when my wife joins in, suddenly it’s a scene from "Duets." Sometimes ...Read more

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Erika Ettin: Top 5 reasons to be thankful in dating

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As Thanksgiving is upon us, it’s time to put aside our pride and simply be thankful for the blessings we have in life: our health, our family… and dating apps?

In this day and age, we can do just about anything with technology: Read a book without flipping a single page, have groceries delivered with the click of a button, see our friends ...Read more

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Tips for handling Thanksgiving this year

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It’s Thanksgiving, and another pandemic holiday season, even though many thought we would be done with all of this. Thankfully, vaccines are available this year, which reduces the issues families will face.

But many will still face a slew of challenges, from what to cook (supply chain problems) to pivoting conversations in a positive ...Read more

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Barton Goldsmith: When you make a big mistake

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We are all human, and none of us is flawless. Even Albert Einstein and Steven Hawking made mistakes, so you’re in good company. I also think we all have done things to mitigate or even get away with our mistakes, which isn’t the best answer. Here are some tips to help you deal with the fallout and make the appropriate corrections when you’...Read more

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Erika Ettin: Pros and cons of dating during the holidays

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Every year, without fail, the holiday season sneaks up on me by surprise. One minute I’m sitting on the beach, and seemingly the next I’m handing out candy to trick-or-treaters. In a blink, it will be Thanksgiving, ushering in over a month of nonstop activities: holiday parties, shopping for gifts, get-togethers with family and friends, ...Read more

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Finally able to wed, couples face logistics like vaccine cards or years-apart dress fittings

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CHICAGO — Excel sheets with proof of vaccination alongside RSVPs. Questions about whether a bar for an after-party checks vaccine cards. Disagreements about whether people want to test, or be around people who won’t test, for COVID-19.

These are all some of the new layers of planning a wedding and surrounding events like bachelor parties or...Read more

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Erika Ettin: The case for not waiting around

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A male client of mine went on 12 dates with a woman over a few months. (For what it’s worth, if you’re still counting the number of dates at this point, I have to wonder why.) My client is looking for a long-term relationship and wasn’t sure how this woman felt about that. (They had only merely kissed, by the way, and had not progressed to...Read more

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Barton Goldsmith: 5 ways to keep the heart fires burning

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There are a million ways to show the one you love just how much you care. These actions can make the difference between a mutually supportive and emotionally engaging relationship and a languishing one. The more energy you put into loving, the more love you will get in return. It’s that simple. Here are five ways to keep the heart fires ...Read more

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Barton Goldsmith: Mindfulness is an everyday pleasure

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Working in a garden, sitting quietly with a drawing pad or writing tablet, sewing or doing needlepoint: All are examples of simple, relaxing activities. They are often spoken of as mindful activities, as they fully involve your attention in the moment and improve different parts of your inner being. But you might be surprised at how even simpler...Read more

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Erika Ettin: The importance of valuing your mental health while online dating

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Starting the online dating process is scary but exciting. You take some nice photos, whip up a witty profile and start scrolling through all the possibilities, which seem endless. But if you’re like most people, the thrilling high is followed closely by lows.

High: You find someone who has an intriguing profile, from common interests to an ...Read more

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COVID-19 etiquette: How to handle awkward vaccine, church and family situations

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In this era of COVID-19, etiquette has often taken a back seat to bad manners. Many of us have witnessed an epidemic of disrespect and rudeness related to the precautions we are taking to protect ourselves.

We asked two etiquette experts for advice on handling the uncomfortable situations we have all had to confront: Yvonne Salas, owner of ...Read more

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Barton Goldsmith: A few ways to believe in yourself more

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We all need a boost sometimes, especially when something goes wrong in our world. When this happens to you, look around you, remember that you started with nothing, and know that everything you see, you created. Here are a few ways to believe in yourself more.

1. Take in the good vibes

Disregard what others tell you unless it’s positive. ...Read more

Richard Tsong-Taatarii/Minneapolis Star Tribune/TNS

Erika Ettin: The 5 love languages of 'The Bachelorette'

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The new season of "The Bachelorette" started back up this week, and, let’s just say, I’m addicted. (I could claim that I watch it for “work purposes,” but I’d be lying.) Now, why am I telling you my taste in reality TV?

It’s so I can relate the various Bachelorettes over time to “The 5 Love Languages,” created by Gary Chapman.

...Read more

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They blazed a trail for gay marriage. Now they're in California's Hall of Fame

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SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Gov. Gavin Newsom and First Partner Jennifer Siebel Newsom inducted the late lesbian rights activists and married couple Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin into the California Hall of Fame during a virtual Tuesday ceremony honoring six Golden State icons.

The couple shared a significant moment in their lives with Newsom when he ...Read more