ArcaMax

PARIS — Remember being a kid and ripping open presents on Christmas morning, only to discover one relative slipped you an envelope of cash instead of yet another oversized plastic monstrosity? That’s Europe right now. Sulking because Trump handed them a practical gift instead of another useless one of transatlantic affection.

Trump’s latest National Security Strategy didn’t supply Europe with its usual warm bath of flattery about shared values and eternal friendship. Instead, it tossed them a cold splash of reality — one that could actually help everyday Europeans and the continent’s political class, who’ve grown addicted to grandiose gestures that look meaningful but accomplish nothing. If only they’d stop pouting long enough to notice the value.

The document points a stern finger at the European Union — that towering bureaucracy, led by an unelected executive presiding over 27 nations — accusing it of undercutting “political liberty and sovereignty, migration policies that are transforming the continent and creating strife, censorship of free speech and suppression of political opposition…and loss of national identities and self-confidence.”

Europe’s response was largely to blow it off as more evidence of Trump falling into Russia’s arms. Bloomberg reported that they’re scrambling to convince him to keep the transatlantic band together, and to tamper down any “disunity” storyline that they’re convinced Russian President Vladimir Putin spends all his time daydreaming about.

If they could just stop making everything about Russia for a hot minute, they might see that Trump is merely reflecting the grumbles of the average European voter. European leaders are watching their poll numbers nosedive while insisting that it’s everyone else’s fault — social media, populists on both the right and left, Putin — rather than acknowledging that their priorities have drifted into the stratosphere. They’ve fixated on external crusades like Ukraine, even as daily life at home feels increasingly held together with little more than nostalgia.

Look, when someone tells you to stand up straight and take care of your own business, the appropriate response isn’t to act like a teenager obsessing over whether their crush is losing interest. Want to prove that you’re strong and independent? Try not having approval ratings that require a microscope to measure. French President Emmanuel Macron — self-appointed class leader of Europe — was sitting at 11 percent support in late October, according to Le Figaro, which puts him mere inches away from statistically evaporating altogether.

Trump is largely taking the same position as European citizens: “Please, for the love of democracy, fix your domestic mess.” But that would mean putting the Ukrainian conflict to rest, which they’ve turned into their favorite proxy security blanket, even as it drags their economies through the mud. It’s like trying to “own Putin” by repeatedly driving your own car into a wall, as the Trump administration keeps suggesting.

“Our goal is to help Europe correct its current trajectory,” the report insists, noting America benefits from a “strong Europe.” Instead, Washington is currently dealing with one that’s drifted into dependency. The report gives a pointed example: German industry relocating their operations to China to access cheap “Russian gas that they cannot obtain at home.”

But let’s not forget that it was Trump — and establishment Washington — who once nudged Europe into overrelying on America, a setup European leaders embraced like obedient interns. Now, Washington’s surprised that China is also cashing in on the dynamic, and doesn’t like the idea so much anymore. The mistake, Europe's original sin, was to have listened to the U.S. in the first place. Arguably, if it had stood up for itself and its own interests at the outset, it would have insisted on securing peace in Ukraine years ago.

The report calls out Europe’s lack of “self-confidence” four separate times. No other region or country gets this sort of “buddy, you OK?” treatment. It even notes that “European allies enjoy a significant hard power advantage over Russia,” yet behave like the kid who keeps letting classmates steal his lunch.

Trump’s view of Ukraine is basically to settle the business side of things with Russia, and that becomes the security guarantee unto itself. But Europe can’t get past the idea that any security somehow requires finding magical battalions of troops among its own people. And for what, exactly? To stand around Ukraine like Costco receipt-checkers, while the U.S. and Russia are busy doing business?

Trump just gave Europe the gift that its own people have long been trying to impose on their leaders, with little success: a mirror that isn’t distorted by their own delusions.