Life Advice

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Advice for Family Member with OCD

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I'd like to hear from people who were children of a mother with Contamination OCD. My daughter's therapist determined it is a pretty severe case, but my daughter refuses to go to the recommended hospital program. Instead, she sees the therapist once a week, which is basically a whack-a-mole approach. One issue gets better and another...Read more

Ask Amy: Spouse can’t bear to be with in-laws

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I can't stand my wife's family.

Things were great in the early years but became progressively worse over time.

Out of the blue my father-in-law insisted on being called “Sir” – after a decade of me calling him by his first name.

He worked hard and came from nothing, but acts like no one else but him can have a successful life ...Read more

Marriage Suffers Due to Wife's Spending

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I am in my mid-30s and have never married or been engaged. I'm feeling frustrated, hopeless and depressed most of the time because of this. Is there really hope? -- Depressed Help-Seeker

Dear Help-Seeker: Of course there's hope. I imagine it can be difficult to see your friends and loved ones hit life milestones you feel quite far...Read more

Ask Amy: Family challenges make it hard to shower

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am writing to ask for your advice on my upcoming bridal shower.

I have a difficult relationship with my parents and sibling and I have worked to set boundaries in the past few years that have made me happier in general.

I no longer choose to feel personally responsible for their happiness or success, because they make their own ...Read more

Desperate to Better My Relationship With My Daughter

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I have been married for 32 years to my husband, who has three children from his prior marriage. The children are now in their mid-30s to early 40s.

We were all a big happy family until about four years ago. The middle child called to tell us that we were both bad parents. I asked her to tell us why she felt that way. She said she ...Read more

Ask Amy: Sexuality might become Thanksgiving table talk

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My son, “Daniel,” who was in a long-term relationship with a woman and has always dated women, has now declared that he is bisexual, and is dating “Timothy.”

This is a first in our family, and I am not sure how or if I should let the rest of the family know about it.

We will be getting together for the holidays pretty soon.

...Read more

Hectic Holidays Approach

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: As the holiday season approaches, I am facing a dilemma and I wonder if you have any ideas. My husband and I each have adult children from previous relationships, none together. My parents will not host any holiday gatherings at their home. If we want to have a gathering, we must invite them to our house. My husband's parents ...Read more

Ask Amy: A large loan outlasts the lender

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband “George” lent our friend “Steve” $60,000.

George died several months after the loan was made.

Steve then ran into some hard times.

He has repaid $30,000, with a commitment to repay the remaining amount.

It’s been two years now, with no mention of making a payment.

Steve is back on his feet and has been able to...Read more

Single File: Solo Dining Rocks!

Life Advice / Single File /

DEAR READERS: For those of you leery about being alone at mealtime, take heart.

This New York reader climbed the Mount Everest of challenges and lived to tell the tale.

"I'm divorced two years. I moved to a trendy town in north Jersey that has many restaurants and bars. I don't really drink, so I don't do the bar scene alone or with a date. ...Read more

Bringing Down Bullies Is a Group Effort

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: This is addressed to the many people who have written to you on the subject of being bullied.

Have you noticed that most, if not all, bullies ply their trade to impress their peers? Bullies bully to gain the attention and approval of someone or some group. They usually pick on someone they think won't fight back -- someone they ...Read more

Ask Amy: Photoshop can’t ‘fix’ this awkward picture

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: “Carlos” and I are both volunteers in an arts organization.

Before knowing him well, I emailed him a photograph I entered into two juried exhibitions. The photo was chosen both times and has been exhibited.

Carlos lists himself as a photographer, which is why I chose to share it.

He wrote back, asking if I’d ever heard of ...Read more

DREAMSTIME/TNS

Why you shouldn't put all your eggs in one basket when dating

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

Ask anyone who has tried it, and they’ll tell you that online dating is a roller coaster of emotions. When you match with someone and the conversation is flowing, it’s easy to get wrapped up in the potential.

That’s exactly what happened to one of my clients recently … let’s call him Ben. Ben had a first date planned with “Julie” ...Read more

Tough Conversations Can't Be Had Over Text

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I had always been told that communication has three major elements: words, tone and body language. Having retired from a technology-driven company, I am keenly aware of misunderstandings between people that can be created beginning with emails and texts.

I remember creating a rule for myself that, if it was an important matter, if...Read more

Ask Amy: Single man wonders if it’s time to rekindle

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My friend “Brian” passed away over three years ago. I was friends with Brian and his wife “Marcia” for more than 40 years.

Prior to their relationship and subsequent marriage, Marcia and I were very close friends. We never dated. We just liked each other's company and had fun "hanging out" together. After a while, she wanted ...Read more

Adam Rose/TNS/TNS

Is it ever OK to date your friend's ex? What 'Love Is Blind' gets wrong

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

Throughout its five American seasons, Netflix's "Love Is Blind" has been packed with dramatic moments — everything from a runaway bride, to one man chucking his fiancée's engagement ring into a hotel pool, to a woman leaving her fiance for another man on the show, and multiple folks second-guessing their engagements after seeing their pod ...Read more

Rude Comments Unwelcome in the Home

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: My husband and I have children from previous relationships, and we each have two grandsons. We have shared a plot of land on the river with his son and family, and my grandsons would visit from time to time.

My husband's son's wife doesn't like my grandsons. In fact, she once made a comment in front of one of them asking why he ...Read more

Ask Amy: Israel-Hamas war hits very close to home

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I are Israeli-American.

We live in the United States and have one child – an infant.

Before children, we agreed on a three-child minimum, but now that we have our baby, I feel very strongly about being a one-child family. My husband still wants to have more children.

We agreed we'd table the discussion for later and...Read more

Ex Keeps Coming Back

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: My husband and I were together for nine years. During that time, we were married for 3 1/2 years. He's 76, and I'm 64. When we were first married, I always questioned if he really loved me. I had moved to Florida in part because I felt he lost interest. So, I was shocked when he proposed.

He has been a sober alcoholic for 12 years...Read more

Ask Amy: Holiday in Europe might involve a rental

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Our son's mother and father-in-law, who live in Europe, have repeatedly invited us to stay at their house, including over the upcoming holidays.

We are considering going, and told them so.

Then I got a text from my daughter-in-law with an Airbnb listing where she said we could stay to be "away from the mayhem."

Amy, mayhem is part ...Read more

Missing My Family More and More

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I have a problem and am earnestly seeking your help.

I am a widow and I have three children. Our family has always been a close one. However, I have encountered a dilemma I never thought I would experience. My daughter is a divorced mother of four grown children. In the past, she always made sure she visited. This has changed in ...Read more