Life Advice
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When the Spark of Love Dies Out
Dear Annie: This is a tough situation and I'm at a loss for what to do next. First, I've been battling a worsening depression for a few years now. I was 34 when I lost my mom on Memorial Day of 2022 and then my dad to a broken heart the next year. After many trials and tribulations through life, I brought myself slightly out of my depression ...Read more
Ask Amy: Elder traveler wants to go solo
Dear Amy: I love to travel. It’s almost an obsession, and age (I’m over 80) has not dulled my desire to GO. I had a good job and saved so that I could travel a lot in retirement.
My husband, however, has lost a lot of his wanderlust, and will only go if I beg and plead.
To keep us both happy, I take one or two trips a year by myself. I ...Read more
Series Of Unfortunate Events Puts Friendship In Question
DEAR ABBY: My friend of eight years, "Lorna," had a family get-together for her daughter, who was graduating from college. I was not invited, which surprised me, since our families were always close. Both of our sons were best friends. After telling me about their party plans, Lorna asked if I could make my special cake. I felt obliged, so I ...Read more
Overly Blunt Tone Rubs People The Wrong Way
DEAR HARRIETTE: I have always valued honesty and transparency in my interactions with others. I strive to provide a realistic perspective and offer straightforward feedback or advice. However, it seems that this approach is not always appreciated or well-received. Rather than being seen as someone who is genuine and reliable, I find that my ...Read more
'gift Of The Magi' Goes To Lunch
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I took a friend out for a nice lunch to thank her for supporting me through a hard time. At the restaurant, she looked through the entire menu and picked the least expensive dish.
I encouraged her to order whatever she wanted, including any appetizers, but she seemed too shy. I was raised to spend less than the person ...Read more
Mother-in-Law Longs for Order
Dear Annie: I need advice on how to approach my son about the disorder in his house. He was raised in a very neat home. When he lived alone for several years, his house was immaculate. He's now been married for four years. They have a 2-year-old and one on the way.
Their house is in total disarray -- laundry basket full of dirty clothes, ...Read more
Ask Amy: New relationship displaces old friendship
Dear Amy: I have a very good friend named “Carl,” who recently began dating a guy named “Samuel.” Samuel is cold to me and seems threatened by my long-standing close friendship with Carl.
I’ve mentioned this to Carl, who’s been dismissive about it.
Recently, Carl had a significant birthday, and when I asked if he was doing anything...Read more
Husband Gives Spouse An Unthinkable Ultimatum
DEAR ABBY: My husband has a poor relationship with our son and his wife. They want nothing to do with him and don't want him around the grandchildren because of how he acts. My husband tells me I should stick up for him and tell them what they're doing is wrong, and that he would never do or say anything bad in front of the grands.
My son and ...Read more
New Mom With Postpartum Depression Ready For Help
DEAR HARRIETTE: Following the birth of my child via a C-section, I started to experience what I believe is postpartum depression. It has been overwhelming and emotionally exhausting. One of the hardest parts for me is feeling an immense pressure to always appear OK. Despite the emotional turmoil I am facing, I feel like I have to hide my true ...Read more
Good Deed Goes Unpunished, Or At Least Ignored
DEAR MISS MANNERS: Following a snowstorm, I went to clean off my car in its space in a reserved lot. An older woman who parks in the adjacent space was doing the same. As I was shoveling out my space, she was knocking snow off her car and letting it pile on the ground.
I understand that older people face physical challenges, as I am in my mid-...Read more
Navigating Forgiveness and Boundaries
Dear Annie: I am 70 years old and blessed with two well-settled and caring grown children (one son and one daughter), who have each been blessed with two kids of their own, making me a grandma of 4 under 4; for which I'm very excited and grateful. Every day of my life, it gives me positive energy.
My marriage of 36 years fell apart six years ...Read more
Ask Amy: Guilt for long-ago behavior won’t fade
Dear Amy: Forty years ago, my wife was pregnant for one trimester. I’ve never forgiven myself for how I acted during those few months.
The pregnancy was planned, but instead of being pleased, doubts and fears assailed me. Rather than being supportive and optimistic with my wife, I was bad-tempered and unsympathetic. I felt trapped and ...Read more
Niece's Wedding Planning Charts Disturbing Course
DEAR ABBY: My niece, who is engaged, is blossoming into a full-fledged bridezilla. She has upset her mother so deeply that she may not attend the wedding. The bride is dictating what her guests are to wear, in addition to telling her mother what she is to wear that day. She has also ordered my sister to get hair extensions and have her makeup ...Read more
Ask Anna: Redefining the 'player': Classy, honest and empowered dating for women
Dear Anna,
Do female players exist? If so, how do I become one? I want to keep it classy and maintain my integrity while I get out there and experience as much as I can. — Getting Action Makes Excitement Outwardly Novel
Dear GAMEON,
Of course female players exist! (As do players of all genders.) The reason you don’t hear about them as ...Read more
Single File: The Joy of Flow
When we're happy, everything seems to fall into place. We're in sync with the universe. Irritants shrink to manageable sizes. The fog of self-absorption gives way to the inner joy we're meant to know all the time. But somehow, it never seems to last very long; pretty soon, the old ways return and dim our vision with the familiar, the routine, ...Read more
Exclusivity vs. official: What's the difference?
I’ve received a lot of questions in the past six months—more than ever before—asking if there’s a difference between being exclusive with someone and the relationship being “official.” People are also asking, “How long should I wait after being exclusive before being ‘official’?”
The question usually comes from someone who ...Read more
Phobias Related To Childhood Trauma Cause Distress
DEAR HARRIETTE: I am currently struggling with a phobia related to gunshots and police sirens due to childhood traumas. When I was a child, I experienced instances where my father would bring conflict into our home, and it has left a lasting impact on me. As a result, I have developed an intense fear and anxiety around the sound of gunshots and ...Read more
Hard To Believe: Yacht Club Members Acting Like Snobs
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband's old boss and his wife invited us to join a local yacht club. Ever since we joined, the wife has been bubbling with snippy comments about my grooming and hairstyle, alluding to where I may have purchased my clothing, and making numerous misguided class-oriented statements.
She seems to have brought me into the ...Read more
Family Wounds and Forgiveness
Dear Annie: When I was 6 years old, my father left my mother for another woman who was 14 years his junior. She had actually been his secretary and had been with him for a couple of years before the divorce. My dad went so far as to even get an apartment for her in the city. She was 16 at the time.
Fast forward, he stayed married to her for ...Read more
Ask Amy: Husband’s love has hit a wrinkle
Dear Amy: My wife of 40 years is a beautiful woman and always has been.
When younger, she turned many heads. To this day (when she wears makeup), she still is quite attractive.
The one caveat is that now that she is in her 70s, she has developed many wrinkles.
She frequently asks me if I think she is looking much older.
I would never upset ...Read more
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