Life Advice
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Son's New Playmate Resides In A Home With Sex Offender
DEAR ABBY: We recently moved to a new neighborhood. My 8-year-old son, "Joey," has become best friends with a classmate, "Paul," who lives on our street. We know from research we did when we bought our house that Paul's stepfather, with whom he lives, is a sex offender who committed crimes against children and served time in prison.
Paul has ...Read more
Saying 'Thank You' at the Grocery Store
Dear Readers: We recently ran a letter from someone who complained that cashiers at grocery stores rarely thank them, the customers. I heard from many of you who have worked as cashiers at supermarkets, and I am grateful for your letters as they provide a firsthand account of the other perspective.
Below are two of those letters. The second ...Read more
Ask Amy: Childfree man doesn’t love the ball pit
Dear Amy: I have a recurring issue when going out with my girlfriend's brother.
Every time we plan to go out with him and his wife, the outings revolve around their children.
As a happily childfree man in his 40s, I have no desire to spend my Saturday watching kids play in a crowded play space.
I have suggested activities that are child-...Read more
Regret and Renewal
Dear Annie: I could have written the letter from "Regretful," who was sad that she and her husband had left the city and moved into a rural area where she is missing out on so much that had made her life fun. For me, it's been 12 years of misery. I used to see my daughters and grandkid almost every day, and now I'm lucky if it's once a year.
...Read more
Ask Amy: Son’s apology demand creates distance
Dear Amy: Several years ago, my father and his wife visited me for a week.
I spared no expense trying to ensure that they enjoyed themselves, particularly his wife. (She married him after I was grown. My own mother died when I was five.)
The week was full of shopping, casino time, outdoor activities, and sightseeing.
I thought it went great. ...Read more
Millennial Life: When Information Isn't the News
The alert on my phone tells me that my package is seven stops away. Clicking into the app, there's a little outline of a truck, but what pulled up was a white sedan, someone's personal car with a few years and more than a few miles on it.
I'm of two minds. Sure, if you're in a neighborhood where you might question whether your package will ...Read more
Brother Is Out Of My Life For Good
Dear Annie: My only brother is 70, two years younger than me. We've not been close or communicating for months. I still resent his failure to acknowledge my marriage years ago. He was not present at my wedding, nor did he even send a greeting card. He missed out on all the formative years of my three children, never attending their events. He ...Read more
Ask Amy: Newcomer needs to find a ‘third place’
Dear Amy: I moved to a semi-rural area for a public-facing job.
One way I am trying to meet people is by hosting small dinner gatherings where I invite a group of people whom I think might make for interesting conversation. These people may or may not already know each other.
This almost never works out. I've had people ask if I will invite ...Read more
Daughter Invites Bad Ex-Boyfriend on Birthday Vacation
Dear Annie: My daughter broke up with her boyfriend several months ago. She just recently hooked back up with him. Needless to say, I don't like him. He is spoiled and rude.
The family was planning a trip for her birthday and she asked if a female friend could come. I told her that would be OK. Now she is telling me that her girlfriend can't ...Read more
Ask Amy: Missing cat takes its toll on a friendship
Dear Amy: My friend’s cat has been missing for two weeks.
I have been supportive in helping her try to find the cat. I also feel her pain.
I have always had cats, but since losing a cat 30 years ago, I have always kept my cats indoors.
My friend lives in a canyon with lots of wildlife, including coyotes, mountain lions, owls, and other ...Read more
Tardy Thank-You Notes
Dear Annie: My daughter received some lovely gifts for her quinceanera (an important milestone in Mexican and Latin American cultures that celebrates a girl's 15th birthday). Unfortunately, there were a few without cards or tags. I am not sure if the card became accidentally separated from the gift, or if there was no card or tag in the first ...Read more
Ask Amy: Solo hiker is creeped out by a stranger
Dear Amy: Most mornings I walk by myself on a forested walking trail.
Like most women, I keep a special eye out for my safety (regularly checking over my shoulder).
(For context, I’m a fairly attractive 33-year-old, or so I’ve been told.)
Recently, one man (aged in his late 40’s) has starting appearing on my walks. At first he seemed OK...Read more
Husband's Hypochondria Getting Out of Hand
Dear Annie: My husband is a hypochondriac. It is so very hard living with him. Every time he hears of someone in our family coming down with an illness, he claims he has it. He is a healthy man and perfectly able-bodied. I get disgusted when he takes a handicapped spot next to a store when I know he doesn't need it.
During the height of the ...Read more
Ask Amy: Online meeting might lead to a trap
Dear Amy: I recently met a nice older man online.
After a few emails and phone calls, “Rob” and I went on several dates.
Despite the difference in our ages (I'm 30, and he's closer to 60), we have many common interests and enjoy spending time together.
Romantically, he is quite shy. So far, just hand holding on walks and a goodnight kiss...Read more
Single File: Looking All Ways
Today's "Single File" column could be headlined "Looking Back, "Looking Ahead" or "Looking Within." Since "Single File" has been printed for over 40 years, all three apply. Because the column is inextricably bound to the lives of the unmarried in this country, this columnist sees its past, present and future as being tightly linked to them. As ...Read more
The secret sauce of text convos: playful reciprocity
Do you often find yourself stuck in an endless loop of lackluster text chains with potential matches?
It’s a common dating app woe, but thankfully, it’s one that you have the power to turn around to work in your favor. Whether you like texting or not, it’s an integral part of modern-day courtship. The sooner you accept that and engage ...Read more
Ask Anna: Is it time to break up? Understanding unrequited love in relationships
Dear Anna,
For the past four months, I've been seeing someone wonderful. They are kind, thoughtful and truly everything one could ask for in a partner. However, despite their undeniable goodness and the time we've spent together, I've come to the harsh realization that I'm not in love with them. I love them as a person, but not in the grand ...Read more
A Note to Caregivers
Dear Readers: A recent column about the caregiver who felt worn out prompted a deluge of letters, mostly from others who are, or have been, caregivers themselves. As I read the letters, I thought of the fact that airlines tell mothers to put on their own oxygen masks first and then help their children. Here is a sampling of the letters we ...Read more
Ask Amy: Granddad is tired of constant video calls
Dear Amy: My stepson and his wife and 3-year-old daughter live in Hawaii.
My wife and I are on the West Coast.
We visit them several times a year, and they visit over the Christmas holidays when they can.
The times we spend together are always warm and drama-free.
We're on good terms, and I adore them.
My one issue is our daughter-in-law. ...Read more
Husband Lacks Experience Parenting Autistic Daughter
Dear Annie: My daughter is 8 years old and was recently diagnosed with autism. She was just diagnosed at age 7, but I have suspected she is autistic since about age 3 when she used to be severely speech-delayed. Over the years, I had suggested she was autistic to my husband several times, and his responses were things like, "She's just a ...Read more