Daughter Is Denying Me Family Time
Dear Annie: I am a widow with a grown son and daughter. We have always been a close-knit family. However, for the last year, I have only had one visit of two hours from my daughter. The previous year, I saw her a few times. She has grown children and is a grandmother of three. She is divorced due to infidelity on the part of her husband. I ...Read more
Ask Amy: Abandoned child now plagued by guilt
Dear Amy: I was abandoned by my mother and adopted by another family at 18-months-old.
Thirty years later, I located my birth parents.
My father declined to meet. I met my birth mother and spent time getting to know her.
In the years since reuniting, she has stolen from me, lied to me, and cut me with her cruelty.
I reached a point where I ...Read more
Annie's Mailbox: Mom's Mail Clerk
Dear Annie: Did you know that an estimated 16 million youth participate in volunteer activities in the U.S. every year, and that by volunteering, these young people will perform better in school? These amazing kids do everything from collecting stuffed animals for children who are victims of tragedy to creating sustainable gardens in urban ...Read more
Kicking My Ex Out of the Driver's Seat
Dear Annie: My roommate, who is also my ex-boyfriend, was involved in a car accident a few months ago. His car was totaled in the process, but he is OK and was not seriously injured. He had to quit his job but has recently found a new one that pays a lot better than his last.
My car has become the primary car of use for him to get to work. I ...Read more
Ask Amy: A woman wants partner’s permission to roam
Dear Amy: I am a woman in a sexless relationship, which is also lacking in affection. We’ve been together off and on (mostly on) for 25 years.
Our relationship is just sharing a home which he owns, and I pay half of the expenses.
We can have a decent home this way, as housing is so expensive.
We are both recently retired.
I have spent the ...Read more
Annie's Mailbox: A Real Friend
Dear Annie: My friend "Nina" just broke up with her boyfriend of five years. We are here for her, trying to help in any way we can, even though we think she is out of her mind for doing this.
One of our friends has been telling Nina lies about the guy, saying he has been talking about her behind her back. I have never heard him do this. All he ...Read more
Parents behind 'Bree's Law' blocked by Dunleavy administration from adapting Alaska's teen dating violence classes for nationwide use
JUNEAU, Alaska — An effort by the parents behind "Bree's Law" to adapt the state of Alaska's teen dating violence curriculum for nationwide use has hit a roadblock after the administration of Gov. Mike Dunleavy this month declined to grant a copyright release.
Butch and Cindy Moore are the parents of Breanna "Bree" Moore, their youngest ...Read more
Dream Job Doesn't Quite Pay the Bills
Dear Annie: I've been married for a long time, and we have teenagers now. When they were young, I took a full-time position working in a school so that I could be on the same schedule as them and we wouldn't have to worry about care during the summer and on winter or spring breaks.
Taking this position cut my salary in half. But I have been ...Read more
Ask Amy: A man’s choice to use a slur riles the family
Dear Amy: At the end of an extremely long road trip, my fiancée, her 16-year-old son and I stopped at a noisy sports bar at 9:30 p.m. – famished.
As we waited for our food, I saw an article regarding a woman who was recently fired for using a slang variant of “the N-word.”
I turned to my fiancée to recount the story, but instead of ...Read more
Annie's Mailbox: Parents at Wits' End
Dear Annie: Our 31-year-old son is bipolar. We did not realize how severe it was until a few years ago. He is a bright, gentle and articulate college graduate who can also be mean, self-centered and highly opinionated. When he takes his medication, he is cooperative and easy to live with. The problem is he won't take his medicine consistently. ...Read more
Husband's 'Red Flag' Has Already Crossed a Line
Dear Annie: My husband and I recently had a heated argument because he threw away some things that I was going to send off to family. It escalated, and as I was trying to walk away, he grabbed me by the shoulders and roughly pushed me up against the wall ... somehow then (I think he kind of threw me, but everything happened really fast) I was ...Read more
Ask Amy: Dog parents bark at one another over sitter
Dear Amy: Several years ago, one of my neighbors asked if I would give her the name of my long-time (about 13 years at that point) dog sitter/walker.
This neighbor said that she and her husband never traveled, so she would use the dog sitter only for occasional walks.
I gave her the number.
Now the neighbor and her husband have begun ...Read more
Annie's Mailbox: Sad in California
Dear Annie: I'm a 70-year-old woman, still attractive and athletic. I have been dating "Sam," age 74, for nearly three years. When we met online, I clearly stated that I wanted to get married in the near future and that I had three cats and wanted a man who loves animals.
Sam is a nice, educated man. He treats me well, and we do a lot of ...Read more
Single File: Emancipation Proclamation
The unmarried are in the middle of a global revolution, largely unheralded by our media, that has, with unerring grace and dignity, moved most of the world's developed countries to adopt laws giving them broad protection and rights. It is sad irony that America, heralded for its pioneering spirit and respect for human rights, is still woefully ...Read more
Erika Ettin: Let sleeping ghosts lie
I have a former male client who has what I’ll call “a ghosting pattern.” He will text someone after a date that he thinks went well to ask her out again. (So far, so good!) She doesn’t answer. (Annoying.) He writes to her again. She doesn’t answer again. He writes again (maybe this time on Facebook and LinkedIn also) … you get it.
Birth Family Crossing Boundaries
Dear Annie: I am 41 and was adopted at birth in a closed adoption. For medical reasons, it was necessary for me to contact my birth mother to obtain information. Since that time, she and I have communicated, though the contact has been limited. She lives far away but has several family members in our area.
I do not wish to hurt their feelings...Read more
Ask Amy: Conversations about Down syndrome feel awkward
Dear Amy: Our family has/had three members with Down syndrome; my youngest sister was born with DS in 1968, and passed away in 2016.
I have a cousin with the condition, and my daughter and her husband have a son (our grandson) with Down syndrome.
I've been involved in the Down syndrome community for many years. I have a teaching degree in ...Read more
Annie's Mailbox: Upset Up North
Dear Annie: I have grown children from my first marriage. I now have a 7-year-old son from my second marriage, and we are home-schooling him.
My older children, who all attended public school, aren't terribly keen on this. One of them, "Jenny," criticizes home-schooling and then gets into what she considers insufficient socialization. She says ...Read more
Enjoying the Spring Season
Dear Readers: Wishing you all a very happy spring. Whether you just celebrated Passover, Easter or any other holiday, I do hope that you make time to celebrate spring. It is a time of renewal where we can shed some of our old patterns and ways of thinking and trade them in for new, fresh thoughts. It is a great time to start a new hobby or ...Read more
Ask Amy: Grandmother wants to help granddaughter’s recovery
Dear Amy: I have a beautiful, smart and wonderful 16-year-old granddaughter who is anorexic.
She has been at a special care facility for the past two months and will be returning home within a couple of weeks.
Of course, this is a very emotional and difficult time for her parents, and the whole family.
My question to you is: What do I say to ...Read more
Inside Life Advice
- Erika Ettin: How do I write a profile that attracts the person I'm looking for?
- Remote work: An underestimated benefit for family caregivers
- Erika Ettin: Is summer a good season for dating? The pros and cons of warm weather wooing
- Young people are having less sex than their parents did at their age. Researchers explore why.
- Stop putting off the end-of-life talk with your aging loved ones. Here's what to say