Life Advice

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Balancing Parenthood's Struggles and Sacrifices

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: Thank you for letting people know the importance of donating pet food to food banks and shelters. Right now we are facing a record number of pets whose families can't feed them! If everyone who could helped pets who have been cared for and loved their whole lives, they wouldn't end up in a noisy, scary, crowded shelter -- where ...Read more

Ask Amy: Friends get scratch for dog sitting

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Friends ask us regularly to watch their dog, but never offer us any compensation. We are not asking for cash, but a gift card would be nice.

They ask us to do this every year for one week in the summer, and then other periods throughout the year, usually lasting for a few days, and sometimes for several days at Christmastime. We live ...Read more

Navigating Marriage 30 Years In

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I have been married for 30 years and feel sad about the way things have been for the last couple of years.

My husband and I were married in May 1993, and I feel like our lives have sent us in two different directions. He is now a pastor of a church, where he has worked for more than two years. I know this is what he has been ...Read more

Ask Amy: Boyfriend’s hoarding messes with relationship

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: “Dave” and I have dated for four years.

We love each other and are both committed to our relationship.

Although we have both agreed not to marry, having survived devastating divorces, we have talked at length about consolidating our homes and moving in together.

My trepidation has completely paralyzed me.

Dave is a ...Read more

Millennial Life: Missing Out With Old-School Tactics

My office is right next to the entrance, with some seasoned and stalwart administrative assistants bearing the weight of navigating employees to their meetings, fending off lost students on campus, and enduring the dad jokes from the mail delivery drivers. Since I keep my door open, I heard the student come in to ask to speak to a hiring manager...Read more

Passing Down Wisdom

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: Here are some suggestions for grandparents who feel worthless:

1. Love your grandchildren; let them know your love.

2. Show them the world around us: parks, zoos, theaters, book stores, libraries and museums.

3. Teach love, patience, honesty and integrity by example.

4. Be available.

5. Listen.

6. Give advice only when asked....Read more

Ask Amy: A long marriage is now on the ropes

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My wife of 27 years recently told me that she has no interest in intimacy or sex any longer.

We have had a poor record in this regard, especially while raising our four kids (three adults, and one teenage girl).

My wife told me that I could not initiate or suggest having sex with her, and that the only way it would happen would be if...Read more

Feeling Like I'm Falling Short

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I am the sole caregiver of my partner of 30 years who started suffering from dementia five years ago. I am at a point where I do nothing all day if I can avoid it. I read compulsively. I start stressing days ahead of when I know I'll have to make a trip to town -- 40 miles roundtrip for groceries, etc.

My partner doesn't require ...Read more

Ask Amy: Parents on the fence over adultery

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My wonderful daughter and her husband have been together for 15 years. They met in college and have been together since the time of their very first meeting.

We genuinely love her husband, “Danny,” and consider him our son.

They have a one-year-old child and we absolutely adore our grandson.

Danny’s job is challenging and he ...Read more

Bride Gets Giddy Over Wedding Gift

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: I have a friend whose son was taking a job across the country after his wedding. She hosted a bridal shower since many of us had met her future daughter-in-law and her parents didn't live nearby. We were asked to give our best marital advice and bring a gift. Since I wasn't married and I had a custodial job, I made a list of ...Read more

Ask Amy: Stylist doesn’t want to cut customer

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I work in a busy hair salon. I have many loyal customers and while they’re in the chair, we talk a lot and share personal information. I’ve gotten to know some of these clients very well, as they show me photos of their kids and spouses (and sometimes their pets).

Recently I was on an online site where people anonymously post ...Read more

Dreamstime/Dreamstime/TNS

Addicted to swiping right? Lawsuit claims Tinder and Hinge are designed to get users hooked

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

If you’re swiping on dating apps for hours, you’re not alone — and a new lawsuit claims it’s by design.

Dating apps such as Tinder and Hinge are intentionally addictive, a class-action lawsuit filed in federal court in California on Valentine’s Day claims.

Hidden algorithms push users to stay on the apps and “gamify dating” — ...Read more

Balancing Boundaries

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: We have a female friend that we have known for years. She lives alone and lost her leg a few years ago, which has limited her ability to venture out.

We have made sure to invite her to events like baby showers and our Christmas cookie exchange, which she tells us are a big deal for her. She always seems excited to attend, despite ...Read more

Ask Amy: Friend is uncomfortable with overshares

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: “Sandy” and I are close friends from college. Our friend group has stayed close, despite living in different states.

We have a group text chat, and occasionally get together.

Recently, Sandy has been going through a rough patch after a painful divorce.

She is something of an “influencer” on social media and has been sharing ...Read more

Dreamstime/Dreamstime/TNS

Ask Anna: Navigating straight curiosity while in a queer relationship

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

Dear Anna,

I'm seeking advice about my sexuality and relationship. I'm in a sapphic relationship and while I love my girlfriend deeply and envision a future with her, I can't shake this lingering curiosity about being with men — despite not actually wanting to act on it due to my commitment to my current relationship. As I've only been with ...Read more

Single File: One and Only You

Life Advice / Single File /

Single life is a series of challenges. But the one that leaves me breathless even as I write this is the supersize twin dare to be undependent (aka whole) during unpartnered phases and to keep that sense of self while coupled. And no, that's not an impossible dream. Radical, yes, but eminently doable. What it takes is conscious -- and constant -...Read more

Dreamstime/Dreamstime/TNS

Defining the relationship: More of a conversation than a specific milestone

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

You’ve swiped right, had the first dates and are now “together” with a person. Great! Or is it?

A client recently reached out to me and said, “I’ve been seeing this guy for about a month from Hinge. I’ve met his family already, mine know about him. We’ve met each other’s friends. When is it OK to define the relationship? Do I ...Read more

Husband Wants to Reconcile After Affair

Life Advice / Dear Annie /

Dear Annie: My husband and I have been having a rough time. He cheated on me with a young woman and got her pregnant. I think this was her goal, secretly. She knew he had a wife and wanted him to leave me.

Anyway, the baby will be 1 soon, and now that my husband is seeking reconciliation, I feel stuck in the middle. I've already been through my...Read more

Single File: Be Good to Yourself

Life Advice / Single File /

I just happened to be reading my book ("Single File," for you in Readerland who haven't yet done the same) and found myself lingering on the "Be Good to Yourself" pages. This is an issue dear to my heart because, to this day, the stereotype lingers of the unmarried as utterly selfish and navel-watching. To be sure, there's much unraveling of old...Read more

DREAMSTIME/TNS

Erika Ettin: Dating red flags: Signs to watch out for in potential partners

Life Advice / Dating Advice /

I’ll admit that the term “red flag” is overused today. People are classifying anything from someone’s taste in music (Broadway for me) to their obsession with their dog as a dreaded red flag. While those things might not align with what you’re looking for in a potential partner, are they truly red flags?

As a dating coach, I've seen ...Read more