Life Advice
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Asking Eric: Girlfriend’s neighborly conversations irk boyfriend
Dear Eric: My girlfriend (30) and I (35) can’t seem to agree about this one thing. She’s friendly with her male neighbor in her apartment building. They don’t go to each other’s apartments, but they’ll say hi in the halls and chat. I don’t like this. I’ve asked her to stop and she won’t. Am I wrong?
– One-woman Man
Dear Man: ...Read more
Feeling Stranded by So-Called Friends
Dear Annie: I am the friend everyone calls when they need something.
I am the one who remembers birthdays, checks in after surgeries, brings soup when someone is sick and sends the "just thinking of you" text. If a friend is going through a divorce, I am there. If someone's child is struggling, I listen for hours. If there is a crisis, I show...Read more
Asking Eric: Writer wonders if their stories are worth hearing
Dear Eric: Over the past two years, I have buried both of my parents. My place in the world going forward feels uncertain and untethered, but in reflecting on their lives and long, long marriage, I now see that everything we are, we have, and we do – to me – really only matters through the lens of story.
From my earliest memory, I wanted to...Read more
Daughter-in-Law Is Dictating Family Time
Dear Annie: I never imagined that after raising three children, loving them through every stage and being a hands-on mother, I would end up feeling like a stranger to my own grandchildren.
My son married a woman who, at first, seemed organized and devoted. Over time, though, it has become clear that she likes to control every family ...Read more
Asking Eric: Pal’s huge ego squeezes friendship
Dear Eric: I have a friend that I generally enjoy spending time with, however she feels the need to constantly put into the conversation how great she is. I call it “Tooting Your Own Horn.” She can be very dramatic in general; I usually just don’t engage with those comments, because giving it air would be validating her grandiose ideas of ...Read more
Millennial Life: Seeing It All Together
Something I have lamented as a parent is that the cultural touchstones of episodic television were not something my kids would experience. Streaming changed the rhythm of watching TV, especially when shows arrive all at once and people watch them at different speeds. The sense that millions of people might be sitting down at the same time to ...Read more
Asking Eric: Father’s simplistic questions frustrate son
Dear Eric: I’m 35 years old with a dad who is 67. We talk frequently about business, sports and politics. We talk just by ourselves and as a group with my wife and mother.
The issue is that my dad asks me questions that are simple to look up online. They very often do not relate to the conversation and are silly.
I have brought up my issue ...Read more
In Need of Guidance on Grief
Dear Annie: Five years ago, I lost my father to heart problems. Three months ago, I lost my mother after a terrible fall. I am 66, and I was her caregiver. I took early retirement at 62 so I could be there for her, and I do not regret it. But now that she is gone, I feel like the role I built my life around disappeared overnight, and I am not ...Read more
Asking Eric: Stepmom goes to great lengths to avoid ‘useless’ stepson
Dear Eric: My husband and his ex-wife have 50/50 custody of their 15-year-old son. I despise this child. He is completely useless, rude, disrespectful, selfish, ungrateful and lazy. All he does is stare at his computer screen.
I have carefully planned my entire life schedule around his schedule, to avoid being at the house on the days he is ...Read more
Afraid To Trade Security for Soil
Dear Annie: I've been married nearly 40 years. My wife's father has passed, and her 81-year-old mother still lives on the family farm. My wife is on a loan her mother took out to buy part of that farm, and she handles everything for my mother-in-law. One of her brothers lives in the farmhouse and is a slob. He won't take off work to take their...Read more
From Retired Accountant to Uninvited Inspector
Dear Annie: My 72-year-old father retired from his accounting job two years ago and appointed himself "Director of Operations" of my household.
He lives 15 minutes away and stops by unannounced at least three times a week. He's reorganized my garage ("Your shelving system was illogical"), corrected how my kids load the dishwasher and replaced...Read more
The High Cost of Being Maid of Honor
Dear Annie: My younger sister is getting married in June and has asked me to be her maid of honor. I was genuinely touched -- until she handed me an extensive "wish list." It includes hosting a destination bachelorette weekend (on my dime until others reimburse me), attending dress fittings three hours away on weekdays, organizing a bridal ...Read more
Single File: Children as Connection (Part 2)
Yes, your children can be a link to life outside parenthood. But how?
--At their religious school, be part of the services. Join the ladies auxiliary. Volunteer to host a meeting of the parents at your home. (Put those singles nights on hold for a while; taking part in your children's lives is much more gratifying.) Your kids will be proud of ...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: How do I heal after a sudden breakup?
We have another batch of dating and relationship questions today. Get ready!
Q: How do I heal after a sudden breakup? I feel no desire to ever date again.
A: What you're feeling right now is completely normal. It feels like your heart is literally broken. You feel like you never want to date again. Don't try to override that feeling. It's part...Read more
Ask Anna: She used to have lots of sex -- why not with me?
Dear Anna,
My girlfriend and I have been together for a while, and we have a genuinely loving, solid relationship. The one real struggle is our sex life. This isn’t a case of the mythical “lesbian dead bed,” because we’ve never had a lot of sex. From the beginning, she’s had reasons for not being in the mood — weight gain, stress, ...Read more
Millennial Life: Old School Could Be the Future
One coffee shop has become, through habit, an extension of my office. Today's meeting was with a field representative of a state congressional delegate. He wanted to share opportunities that might be available at a federal level. I spied a name written on the opposite side of the notebook where he was writing and told him I knew that person too,...Read more
Ask Anna: My boyfriend keeps prioritizing other women -- what do I do?
Dear Anna,
I’m 32 and my boyfriend of three years constantly prioritizes other women over me in small but consistent ways, and it’s driving me crazy. He’s a generally nice guy — the kind who prides himself on being helpful and chivalrous — but somehow I’m never the one receiving that treatment. A few recent examples: We were at the ...Read more
Single File: Children as Connection (Part 1)
Skip today's column if you're looking for startling new techniques guaranteed to benefit the children of mateless mothers like you. As much as I feel a special tenderness for young people who grow up with a single parent (my own son, Scott, was only 4 when he became part of a two-person family), what we're interested in right now is you. ...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: How many dating apps should I be on?
We’ve all heard the sayings “less is more” and “quality over quantity,” and in many ways, those phrases apply to the world of online dating, at least in terms of how many dating apps you should use. But with all the platforms available, it’s common for single people to be using more than one app at the same time… in fact, I ...Read more
Millennial Life: The Author I Used to Be
When you publish a column each week, you rarely imagine that one day someone will ask you to stand in a quiet library and account for all of it. Columns are written in response to motion. You build a shape with 800 words around it before the next deadline arrives. The work feels immediate, but somewhat temporal.
Then my syndicate decided to put...Read more
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