Dating Child's Teacher Could Be Tricky
DEAR HARRIETTE: My daughter's teacher asked me out on a date today and I said yes. However, I am worried about how this will affect her. I am a single mom to my 10-year-old daughter, and she is my world. I haven't been out on a date in four years and I'm nervous, especially because he is my daughter's teacher. My daughter really likes her teacher, and I don't want anything to make her feel uncomfortable or affect her experience at school. I also don't know if I should tell her about the date or wait until I know whether this is something serious. Part of me is excited to finally put myself out there again, but another part is worried about mixing my personal life with my daughter's school life. I want to make sure I am making a decision that is best for both of us, and I don't want my daughter to feel like she has to choose sides if things don't work out. Do you think I should cancel the date or give myself a chance at dating again? -- Crossing the Line
DEAR CROSSING THE LINE: The safest thing to do is to pass on the date while saying that you are interested and flattered but think it would be better to go on a date when she is no longer his student. If you can live with that, you will be protecting all parties.
If you really want to see if there's a spark, go out with him somewhere discreet where you're not likely to see school parents, and talk. Get to know each other a bit and see if there's a genuine spark. Even then, my recommendation would be to say that if there's even a chance for something to come of this, you need to wait -- yes, a whole year, until she is no longer in his class. Otherwise, it is bound to get messy, and the one who will suffer the most is your daughter.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm noticing a major lack of intention from one of my close friends. She rarely reaches out, checks in, makes plans or does anything to nurture our friendship. Yet whenever we happen to run into each other, she gives these larger-than-life speeches about how we need to do better as friends and make more time for each other. I used to make the effort, but I eventually noticed that whenever I called or made plans, our time together was often spent talking about why we weren't closer. It felt like a poor use of the little time we actually had. So, I stopped initiating -- and months went by without hearing from her. Recently, we ran into each other and, once again, she launched into her usual spiel: "Why don't we ever see each other? We need to do better!" This time, I told her, "No, you need to do better." She was offended and confused, but I didn't elaborate. How do I have an honest conversation with someone who values the idea of friendship but doesn't seem to practice it? -- One-Sided
DEAR ONE-SIDED: Schedule a time to get together and lay it out for her. Tell her how you feel about her comments and lack of follow-through. Explain that it hurts your feelings. If you are to be friends, you need to refresh the relationship.
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(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole
COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.
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