Son Drops Med School, Picks Up Modeling
DEAR HARRIETTE: My son quit medical school about a year ago to chase his passion of becoming a model. He moved to New York City, but he hasn't been able to book many jobs. He also works part time as a server to be able to cover his living expenses. I will admit I am disappointed that he quit medical school to pursue a path that isn't working out how he wants it to. He recently told me he wants to move back home to Colorado and asked if I thought that was a good idea. I honestly wasn't sure how to respond in the moment because I don't want to be the mom who tells her son to give up on his dreams, but the other part wanted to tell him to come back to Colorado. I know moving back home doesn't necessarily mean he has to give up on modeling, but I wonder if leaving New York would make it harder for him to pursue his dream. I also worry that he may feel like he has failed if he comes home, even though I don't want him to see it that way. Part of me wants him to stay and give modeling more time, while another part thinks he should focus on building a more stable future. How do I help him make the right decision without making him feel like I am giving up on his dreams? -- Supporting My Son
DEAR SUPPORTING MY SON: Your son needs to hear that you will support him no matter what as he goes through this uncertain period. He has a lot to figure out. Is his interest in being a doctor completely dead? How passionate is he about modeling? This is a fickle industry that is even tougher for men. Does he have what it takes to go on endless auditions and face multiple rejections with the hopes of a big break? What might he want to do now? What does coming home to Colorado mean for him? A time to reset? The need for a hug? Another pivot?
Consider inviting your son to come home for a moment -- say a week's visit -- before deciding to move. Agree that you will talk about everything, and you will do your best to support his process. What he needs most is to know that you have his back. The other thing he needs is to make the decision himself.
DEAR HARRIETTE: How do you get over resentment? I have always had a rocky relationship with my father due to the way he treated my mom while he was struggling with addiction. I find myself still feeling hurt by his past actions despite him being sober for five years and my mom leaving him. I know he tries to do better, but I feel like there's more he could do. My sister is still young, and he barely helps with her financially and rarely watches her. Seeing how that affects my sister impacts how I see him. I struggle sometimes to no longer see him as an absent alcoholic parent. Do you have any advice on how to not let his past actions affect my feelings? -- Resentful Child
DEAR RESENTFUL CHILD: Try to develop a relationship with him now. Talk to him. Listen. Let him know that you are struggling. Ask him what he wants for his life with his children. See how he responds. Do your best to live in the present. That should help.
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(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole
COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.
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