ArcaMax

Dear Eric: I have been in central Florida for more than 26 years, and it has become unbearable to me. There’s the brutal heat; the skin destroying UV-rays of that miserable, scorching, eye-blinding sun; the constant allergy/sinusitis issues that NEVER let up; the smothering humidity. The sun is here all year.

If you dare to venture out for a walk during the day, you have to wear long sleeves, long pants, a big, brimmed sunhat, a face full of sunscreen and carry a sun umbrella. This is paradise?

It's impossible to talk about it to my husband of 51 years; he is always cold, puts the A/C at 80 degrees in the house, and walks around with a sweatshirt or flannel shirt on.

I have a 12-year-old rescue dog, a big black German Shepherd. I have limited income and want to move much further north, but I don't want to jeopardize the stable home I can give her here.

I am at the point that I dread waking up every morning only to see that intense Florida sun that keeps me in the house most of the day. I could leave my husband, but I CANNOT leave this vulnerable, loyal, loving creature that is by my side 24/7.

Because of my limited income, it would be rough finding a place that is safe and secure for me and my dog.

I'm basically a very friendly, outgoing person, and living here is like being under house arrest. What should I do to preserve my health and sanity until such time that I can get a car and drive out of this place?

– Too Hot

Dear Hot: While you technically can’t outrun the sun – it does have a way of finding us – and the impacts of climate change are being felt the world over, it may help to attack this issue in pieces.

First, some immediate relief: is there a friend or relative who lives in a cooler place and would let you and your dog visit for a week or more? As fall progresses, this might be the perfect time to get away for a bit to clear your head. This wouldn’t require you to leave your home or your marriage but could turn the heat down on the problem for a moment.

Consider talking to your husband about whether he actually likes Florida or just likes warm weather. If it’s the latter, there might be other places that suit you both better.

Lastly, if you do decide you need to make a permanent move, look seriously at your finances and perhaps enlist friends or relatives to help you find a suitable place to live in a cooler climate. Without knowing what your income is or what your living situation is in Florida, I can’t say for sure that there are similar places in other parts of the country for you and your dog, but it’s true that people of all income levels afford lives with pets in every state. So, it may take some creative thinking, but it is possible to find a new home, if you need to.

Dear Eric: I am writing in reference to the letter by “Mourning Mom”, whose son said he wouldn’t honor her burial wishes.

A possible solution to her problem could be a prepaid funeral. If she has a trusted funeral service provider, she can set up a contract and prepay for her funeral. These contracts allow you to stipulate your preferences as to cremation or another type of service.

As to the cremation you can decide if you want a “direct to cremation.” This means your remains are collected from the hospital and taken directly to the crematorium. There is no embalming or casket.

Or, you can also choose to have an open casket for visitation and viewing with cremation following the service. In this instance you can rent a casket for the viewing.

The contract also allows you to choose your urn for cremation, location of the service, location of the burial, the songs you wish sung, the person you wish to perform the service and any other items you wish to state. You can even write your own obituary for the mortuary to keep on file.

You pay up front and the money is invested by the mortuary. Depending on the length of time between when you sign the contract and pay and the time it is used, your money collects interest. If there is any money left over it is turned over to the estate. This could avoid problems with the location of a will in time so that your wishes would be carried out.

– I'm All Set

Dear All Set: This is very comprehensive and quite helpful. A great option for the letter writer and, I’m sure, other readers as well.

(Send questions to R. Eric Thomas at eric@askingeric.com or P.O. Box 22474, Philadelphia, PA 19110. Follow him on Instagram and sign up for his weekly newsletter at rericthomas.com.)

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