Neighbor Yells At Child About Street Safety
DEAR HARRIETTE: One of my neighbors yelled at my 10-year-old for not being careful while crossing the street. My family's house is a few doors down from a turn where it can sometimes be difficult to make sure that it is clear to cross the street. Usually my daughter is very responsible, making sure to be extra careful when crossing the street to go visit her friends, who live nearby on the other side of the road. However, one time a car came around the corner and was careful to stop to make sure my daughter could cross safely. The driver, who turned out to be a neighbor, came back an hour later to knock on our door and scream at my child about how she needs to be more careful. My daughter was shaken up by the encounter and was left feeling scared and embarrassed. I understand that the driver may have been concerned about her safety, and I certainly want my daughter to be as careful as possible when crossing the street. However, I don't think it was appropriate for an adult to come back to our home and yell at a 10-year-old. If the driver was genuinely concerned, I wish they had spoken to me instead of confronting my daughter directly. How should I handle this situation while making sure my daughter understands the importance of street safety without allowing a neighbor to intimidate her? -- Protecting My Child
DEAR PROTECTING MY CHILD: Go to the neighbor and talk to them about the encounter. Thank them for avoiding hitting your child with their car and state that you wish they had come to you to report the incident rather than chastising your child. You felt that was crossing the line.
Next, research whether some kind of safety or warning sign can be placed at the precarious turn to help avoid an accident in the future. You may need to get neighbors to sign a petition. Go to that neighbor first for help.
DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I fundamentally do not agree on boundaries when it comes to friends. He likes when people stop by unannounced, even when it's mealtime and they weren't invited or when we are busy doing something that does not include them. He is immediately willing to stop whatever we are doing and include the person who has rung the bell. I understand generosity, but there is a limit. I don't want to -- and honestly cannot afford to --feed people with regularity when I had no expectation of them coming. Similarly, I would like to be able to have privacy at home, at least on occasion. How can I get this point across without seeming selfish? -- Boundaries
DEAR BOUNDARIES: In order for this to change, you and your husband have to work it out. What is a potential compromise? Your husband will need to tell the people who regularly stop by to check in first before ringing the bell. Why not call before coming? That way they can know whether it is a good time. Appeal to your husband by reminding him of how important it is for your family to have private time. You want him to value that as much as being welcoming to others.
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(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole
COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.
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