ArcaMax

DEAR HARRIETTE: I announced to my team at work that I am pregnant, and my manager's response was not what I was expecting. She said congratulations, but she looked devastated, and I saw tears starting to fill her eyes. Then she ran out of the room, leaving us all confused. Later, we found out that she has been trying to get pregnant for seven years without any luck. Once we learned about her fertility struggles, I felt terrible for her. I can't imagine how painful it must be to want a child for so many years and continue facing disappointment. At the same time, I feel conflicted because this is one of the happiest moments of my life, and now I feel guilty whenever I talk about my pregnancy at work. What was supposed to be an exciting time has become something I feel the need to tiptoe around.

Since the announcement, my manager has been polite and professional, but there has been an awkwardness between us. She no longer engages in conversations about my pregnancy and sometimes leaves the room when other co-workers bring it up. I care about my manager and sympathize with her situation. At the same time, I don't know what my role should be in making her feel comfortable. How can I try to accommodate her feelings but also be able to be excited about my pregnancy at work? -- Pregnancy Test

DEAR PREGNANCY TEST: You do need to stay mindful of your manager's sensitivity, but also live your life. Put work first. But be happy when you share bits about your experience with others. You may also want to say something directly to her. Let her know how sorry you are that she has not yet been able to become pregnant. Tell her you don't want your reality to bring her pain but also you cannot hide what is happening. Perhaps this will help her own her role. As the leader, she has to find a way forward that does not compromise team effort and energy.

DEAR HARRIETTE: My co-worker wears short skirts that are not flattering on her. This is primarily because she is not fit, and her legs are covered in cellulite. I am not body shaming, but because of the condition of her body, all you see when you look at her is a deteriorating body rather than a strong, capable woman. Is there anything I can say to her to encourage her to modify her attire to make her look more professional? -- Dimpled

DEAR DIMPLED: Be careful on this one. Perhaps you could invite your co-worker to go shopping with you. Lead her to trousers that look professional, and suggest that she try on a couple of outfits. Talk about how they emphasize a positive aspect of her presentation. If she goes for it, see how others respond. If she gets good feedback, that may lead her to seeking another pair of pants. If you feel like she might benefit from more exercise, you can talk about your own fitness efforts -- though it's proven that working out does not get rid of cellulite -- but be careful not to point the finger at her.

An important thing to note is that cellulite is not an indication of a "deteriorating" body; it is merely a harmless skin condition that occurs in 80% to 90% of all women at some point in their lives.

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(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole

COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.