Creating Balance Is Important
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm someone who keeps a very busy schedule. I thought I enjoyed being busy because that's what made my mind feel at ease. However, therapy and self-discovery have led me to realize I feel like I must stay busy because my mind does not feel comfortable being relaxed. Having a packed schedule is sustainable as a teenager, but the older you get, the more time you need for yourself.
I'm trying to learn to balance my personal interests, relationships and work in a way that is healthy, but I'm not too sure that I know what that looks like. As I become more comfortable with the idea of relaxation, I'm realizing it would be helpful to learn how to create balance in my week. How do you recommend I balance a busy schedule? -- Busy Bee
DEAR BUSY BEE: Well, you have written to a workaholic -- me. I work all the time, often on weekends, so I know what you are talking about. I think I rationalize it as being an entrepreneur and always having to be ready and willing to do what it takes.
I will tell you two things that I do that help create balance. First, I make lists every day of what I have to do that day. For many years, I have included self-care and family on the list. Under self-care, I include basics like "drink water" or "take a walk" because I know that when I get busy, I don't remember the basics. I also schedule in fun; that way I actually do it. Additionally, I practice meditation. Having the discipline of that spiritual practice that requires you to be still, control your breath and just exist has been transformative for my life. I highly recommend it. Yes, it forces you to be with yourself, but the inner discoveries that come if you are willing to pay attention are invaluable.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I never do this, but your response to a recent letter upset me. You ignored the mean-spiritedness of the letter.
Although I appreciate you mentioning the reality of cellulite to "Dimpled," the person whose co-worker wears short skirts, but you stopped short of telling them that their letter itself is grounded in body-shaming. This person never mentioned being a boss or HR employee to their skirt-wearing co-worker, so her professional appearance is none of their concern. Nothing they said implied any negative work-related issues due to this woman wearing short skirts, only that they themselves don't like seeing this woman's legs. The truth is that this woman's legs are none of their business, and I hope you can see how their focusing on this is highly inappropriate and insensitive, especially if they themselves are not a woman (but truly, no man or woman should be focusing that much on their co-workers' bodies). -- Offended
DEAR OFFENDED: Thank you for your note. You are absolutely right that it is none of that co-worker's business. I jumped to "how to help." I would never intentionally body-shame anyone, nor want to inadvertently suggest that others do that. Because I have a background in fashion, honestly, I immediately went to ideas on how that woman could showcase her assets, neglecting to address the obvious point: Mind your business.
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(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)
Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole
COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.
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