ArcaMax

DEAR ABBY: My wife and I have been married for 20 years. She's an academic, and we've lived a transient lifestyle to accommodate her career. She had a greater professional vision than I ever did, so I opted to stay at home and raise the children. I became Mr. Mom at great social cost. It was hard to make friends, and many in my social circles (...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My father is in his mid-80s. He has been to the hospital several times in the last month because of age-related medical conditions. A family member is vacationing here and wants to stay at dad's house for a week instead of a hotel or bed-and-breakfast. Dad told me he's not feeling up to it, but he doesn't know how to tell them without...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I am a retired executive chef, divorced for many years with three adult children. My son was also an executive chef, but no longer. He is a mean alcoholic. He stays drunk when not at his job, and he says cruel and nasty things to all family members. His older sister has written him off because of all the hurtful things he has said ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have a group of friends who get together once a month, usually for a casual dinner. Next month's gathering will be to celebrate three birthdays, one of which is mine. While planning this gathering (via text), I asked if we could skip exchanging presents and just enjoy our time together. The response from my friends was "No! We're ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have a mother-in-law of 30 years I distance myself from. I do this in order to maintain my sanity. She seems incapable of carrying on a normal conversation and responds to any comment or question by talking about herself, even though it usually has nothing to do with what was said. What bothers me most is when she's around our adult...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I am a widow who lost my husband 15 years ago. When my husband died, we had a daughter and one grandson. My daughter, a single mom, later had another son.

I have my own business and have worked hard these many years to help support my daughter, who is financially irresponsible. She has been evicted four times in the past 10 years, ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My husband, "Dirk," cheated on me more than 20 years ago. He has kept in touch with the woman since then. Sixteen months ago, she told him she was "in a bad place." He offered to let this (married) woman move in with us and didn't tell me until two weeks before she got here.

Abby, this woman lives like a pig. Her room is filthy, and ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My mom died of extreme old age recently. She was a sweet woman everyone loved. I sent invitations to her memorial, and I'm getting a lot of excuses for why my friends can't attend. I am upset.

In my circle of friends (all similar ages), I was the last to graduate, get a career job, start a relationship, buy a house, be married and so...Read more

DEAR ABBY: You sometimes ask readers to share their pet peeves. I am a public school teacher, and here is mine: Parents wonder why their children misbehave, argue with them and act out with attention-getting behaviors. My advice to them: Put down those cellphones and pay attention to your kids!

I just had a conference with a mother whose ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I am a single woman in a friendly neighborhood. Every month, I have the neighbors over for dinner and a movie. I like to be inclusive -- bring the kids, bring the dogs! One couple recently had their elderly mom move in, and I installed a ramp so she could join us. Babies cry, dogs bark, women breastfeed, but all are welcome. I put ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I am a man in my 40s. A woman and I had a relationship that ended badly. We met on the job, though we work in different departments. Everyone knows about our previous relationship, and it is extremely awkward. Every time I walk by, there are lots of smiles and chattering; when I approach my co-workers' desks, I'm greeted with silence ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: A dear friend of 10 years experienced a severe mental health crisis. I did my best to reach out to her, but she pushed me away and flaked on plans and important events at the last minute at least a dozen times. Once her mental health began to improve, I approached her and told her I understood her behavior had been largely out of her ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My husband (80) and I (72) have been married 25 years. This is the second marriage for both of us. Until three years ago, I felt I had a wonderful relationship with his family, so it's hard to deal with what he's done to me and my relationships with them.

A new daughter-in-law, "Jean," who has a granddaughter, "Sophie," has fostered ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My next-door neighbors are appropriately friendly, mow their lawn and generally mind their own business. The husband is a leader in a fundamentalist church whose pastor preaches that being gay is a sin and transgender people are mentally ill. My wife and I are lesbians, and our middle child is transgender. This is obvious to anyone ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: A good friend in our prayer circle, "Diane," has a friend, "Suzy," with whom several of us once socialized. We've all distanced ourselves because Suzy has anger and stability issues that have become increasingly frequent since her former spouse has begun dating again. Diane allows Suzy to verbalize all kinds of half-truths and act out...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My grandson is 2 and has started to call me "Mimi." The problem is that his other grandmother chose Mimi for herself. My daughter-in-law is annoyed and does not want him calling me Mimi. She also doesn't want me to be called Mom-Mom because he calls her Ma-Ma. Am I wrong to be upset? I've been an active caregiver in this child's life ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I am a person with a million-dollar heart and a 5-cent bank account. I have big dreams that I know could change lives. I want to write a book about my experience with emotional abuse so I can help others heal. I also dream of starting a soda stand to build something tangible with my kids.

The problem is that my current life is ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: About 15 years ago, my nephew gave me a birthday gift of a baseball bat signed by a top player. I love baseball, so it was a lovely gift. After I thanked him, he said, "When my son is older, I would like you to give it to him." We have been estranged now for at least 10 years because his spouse dislikes our family for some reason.

Am...Read more

DEAR ABBY: My friend "Ben" and I had many ups and downs in our 30-year friendship. Three years ago, we had one of our periodic blowouts and stopped speaking. I found out recently that he passed away a year later, and I was never informed. The obituary I found online does not mention a cause of death.

I wrote a letter of condolence to his wife, ...Read more

DEAR ABBY: I have a younger brother who has moved back to the area where the rest of our siblings live. He went for 30 years without keeping in close contact with anyone during that time. He's the youngest of 10 children, and our mother spoiled him rotten. He's in his 60s now and still acts like an immature spoiled child. Our father had to bail ...Read more