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Friend Wants Compensation For Watching Dog

Harriette Cole on

DEAR HARRIETTE: My friend recently got a dog, but she and her family travel a lot, so they need to find care for the dog when they leave. I have been friends with her for more than 20 years and love animals, so I have been watching her dog. However, she doesn't ever pay me for doing this. Sometimes they are away for three weeks or more, and I have never seen a single cent. At first, I didn't mind helping because we've been such close friends for so long and I genuinely enjoy spending time with the dog. Over time, though, it has started to feel like she takes it for granted that I will always be available and willing to take care of him. When she tells me about an upcoming trip, it's usually phrased more like a statement than a question, as if it's already understood that I will be the one watching the dog.

Watching a dog for that long requires more responsibility than I think she realizes. I have to adjust my schedule to make sure the dog gets walked several times a day, is fed and has company. I don't necessarily expect to be paid like a professional dog sitter, but it does hurt that she has never offered anything in return. Should I ask for compensation next time? -- Doggy Time

DEAR DOGGY TIME: Neither of you made parameters for watching the dog from the beginning. Your friend has made assumptions that never got checked. Stop resenting her presumptiveness and talk to her. Tell her that while you love her and her dog, what you have taken on is a much bigger responsibility than you imagined.

If what you want is money, frame it so that she knows that you feel like you should be receiving compensation for watching her dog. Do your research. Tell her what a professional dog walker and boarding would cost where you live, and offer her a discounted price for your services. There's a good chance she will be taken aback at first, as she mistakenly thinks you "should" do this for her as her friend. Stand your ground. Let her know that keeping her dog weeks at a time is a huge job that directly impacts your life's flow. You should be compensated for that, or she can board the dog. Her choice.

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've developed a relationship with a guy I met through mutual friends. We've been friendly for about a year now, but in the past few months we started hanging out more frequently. At first, it still felt like a budding friendship, but our most recent hangouts have felt less friendly and more romantic. Neither of us has ever called it a date out loud, but he always pays, and the last time he even had his arm around me. It's definitely been a slow burn, but I appreciate how respectful he is. He even texts me a short prayer every morning.

This weekend, I sent him a photo of myself at a special occasion, and all he said was, "Nice." That did not feel romantic at all. Is it possible that I am misconstruing this situation? -- MAYBE PLATONIC

 

DEAR MAYBE PLATONIC: Don't be discouraged by something as trivial as a comment on a photo. It sounds like he is just being as respectful as possible. Since he texts you every morning, I'd say he is definitely interested in you. Ask him what he wants in a relationship. What is his vision for the future? Tell him yours. See if you can start a conversation that might get him to state his intentions.

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(Harriette Cole is a lifestylist and founder of DREAMLEAPERS, an initiative to help people access and activate their dreams. You can send questions to askharriette@harriettecole.com or c/o Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.)

Copyright 2026, Harriette Cole


COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.

 

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