Life Advice



Ask Amy: Trust issues interfere with married roommates

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am in a five-year marriage that I feel is more like a roommate situation. We hardly ever do things together.

Our sexual relationship is almost nonexistent (I'm just not interested in being intimate with him anymore).

He has cheated a few times.

I only cheated one time, and that was to get back at him.

I know two wrongs don't make a right, but since the infidelity, I often find myself not trusting him.

I'm torn up deciding what to do about this relationship.


We have trust issues, and now I feel as if we're growing apart. I care about him, but I'm not in love with him like I used to be.

I'm tired of arguing with him every day and want some peace and happiness in my life.

I know therapy is what most people would suggest, but I already know what therapists are going to say so that's why I don't go.

Because of all the issues and the gaslighting that goes on I feel like it's time to call things off (he sort of agrees with me), but I can't seem to leave.


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