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Midlife dater ignores red flag waving

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I casually dated two different men at the same time: One man is my age (early-50s), and another man is 20 years older.

I did not commit to either man, nor did I lead them to believe that we were exclusive.

When my mom got sick and my workload increased, I told each man that I needed to focus on other things, and asked for some space.

The younger man respected my request and for the last several months has sent me an occasional text or phone call to say hello, which is fine with me.

The other man was texting me every single day.

I found it annoying, and rarely responded. Eventually I wrote him a letter making it very clear that I do not want a romantic relationship and would like to be friends, but that can only happen if he backs off. He continues to send me at least one text every day, which goes unanswered.

 

My mother is now stable, and I am ready to start dating again.

The guy who texts every day tells me he loves me and that he just wants me in his life. He's not a terrible guy; he's generally kind and makes a good living.

Is it possible that he is being chivalrous, and this is his way of fighting for me?

Or is this a red flag hitting me in the face?

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