Life Advice



Ask Amy: Former in-law’s contact riles hurt feelings

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I had a wonderful relationship with my in-laws while my ex-husband and I were married. However, following our divorce, he and I no longer speak.

He’s also asked me NOT to reach out or talk to his family.

His sister and his father have respected his wishes and have never reached out to me. Honestly, I found this very hurtful.

His mother called a few times over the past year, mostly around the holidays, and each time it was difficult and painful to talk to her.

I never initiated any communication.

At Christmas she left me a voicemail crying about how much she missed me and missed having her family together. She implied that I wasn’t doing well, and that hurt my feelings, too.


I did not call her back and have not talked to her since.

Around Easter, she sent a card, noting how much she missed me and how much she loved me.

Again, I did not respond, but she did ask my son during a visit if I ever received a card from her. She did the same on Mother’s Day.

I find it to be very hurtful.


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