Life Advice



Ask Amy: Abandoned child now plagued by guilt

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I was abandoned by my mother and adopted by another family at 18-months-old.

Thirty years later, I located my birth parents.

My father declined to meet. I met my birth mother and spent time getting to know her.

In the years since reuniting, she has stolen from me, lied to me, and cut me with her cruelty.

I reached a point where I decided that as much as I wanted a mother, I did not need or want a toxic relationship in my life, and I stopped communicating with her. I did explain to her why I was going to stop communicating.

Her reply was, “I’ll see you in Hell.”


Many months passed without any word from her.

Over the last few days, I've heard from her several times.

She apparently had a fall and is in a nursing home and needs help, because she wants to go home.

I continue to struggle with a sense of responsibility toward her, even though I know that she is poison for me.


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