Ask Amy: Siblings estranged from mom want no contact
Dear Amy: My brother and I are both in our late 30s.
After years of strife and our mother’s refusal to respect any of our stated boundaries, in early 2020 (after several pointless therapy sessions with her), we made the decision to go “no contact.”
We told her in therapy and in writing that we were no longer going to have a relationship, along with the SPECIFIC reasons why.
Coincidentally, both of us were also moving to new homes and we told her that we would not give her our new addresses.
She ignored that, hired a lawyer and a private investigator, got our addresses, and had things delivered to our homes.
She had a famous “specialist” in estranged families reach out to us.
She had her lawyer contact us. She sent emails and physical mail to both of our workplaces. We did not respond.
Finally, she had a family friend, “Laura” contact me.
Laura is very nice. About 15 years ago, she let me stay at her home in Europe.
Her email basically stated that our mother is devastated by the estrangement, family will always be family, no one is perfect, etc. etc.