Ask Amy: Pandemic places extra stress on holiday visits
At that time, I made the (horrible) decision to share that conversation with my mother and my sister.
I now realize that I had no business sharing that with anyone and have kept it private ever since.
Now, Christopher is planning to travel across the country with me to spend Christmas with my mother and sister.
Should I tell him that my mother and sister know what happened in the war?
I’m afraid that if I tell him that they know, he may decide not to come — or worse, that he may never want to be around them again.
He feels ashamed of this event, even though it was not his fault, and he handled himself like a true soldier.
– Betrayed his Trust
Dear Betrayed: You should tell “Christopher” the truth about your disclosure to these family members. You can tell him that you did so early on, when you were searching for support.
He has been extremely honest and vulnerable with you, and you should be brave enough to be honest with him now. You must also accept the confusion and consequences flowing from your honesty.
This is one of those “elephant in the room” situations, and it would be best for him to be prepared for it.