Ask Amy: Friend needs a different kind of wake-up call
It hurts my father's feelings if I decline the gift from him.
This puts me in a terrible spot, choosing between my father's generosity and my husband's good graces.
I don't think what my father is doing is weird or unreasonable.
Am I wrong?
Dear Conflicted: In my opinion, what your father is doing is generous and sweet.
I agree with your take on this – that this is one tangible way your dad shows you how he feels about you.
It’s the sort of bestowing that people of few words will engage in.
If your dad grew up with few resources, this sort of obvious generosity makes him feel good. It reminds him that he has made it in life.
Your husband disapproves. His own father may show his affection differently – or perhaps – not at all. That’s why he is so threatened by this largesse.