Life Advice



Ask Amy: Funeral mix-up creates family break

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: My father passed away recently, and I was responsible for planning the funeral, during COVID.

In order to minimize everyone’s risk, we chose to hold a church service and a graveside service.

Due to a mix-up with the time for the graveside service, several people who did not feel comfortable going into the church — including our adult child — missed the graveside service.

Our adult child is blaming us and will not return calls, emails, texts, etc.

I’m at a loss about what to do.

I am grieving my father and also the loss of a relationship with our adult child and their family.


We just want to have communication, and to be allowed to see our preteen grandchildren and our adult child.

Please help.

– Grieving

Dear Grieving: If there are things you wish you had done differently regarding the arrangements you made, you should take responsibility, apologize, and affirm your child’s disappointment and hurt over this mix-up.


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