Mom has a 'Brad' problem
Dear Amy: I am a 36-year-old mother. My daughter, "Stacy," is 18. Her boyfriend, "Brad," is 30.
Stacy and Brad have been together for a year. He moved in with us as soon as they started dating.
So many factors are frustrating for me. Why did I allow this in the first place?
Brad drinks too much, can't hold a job and doesn't contribute financially to the household.
But my daughter, who had depression and severe anxiety, is actually happy and doing amazingly well right now.
I am done supporting the boyfriend, but my daughter can't understand why I'm frustrated.
Can you offer your feedback on my situation?
-- Done Mom
Dear Done: No. You should never have allowed your teen daughter's adult boyfriend to move into your home. But it's a true fact that few families operate according to an ideal blueprint. You may have felt that having him in your home was safer than her perhaps running away and living with him. And you would have been right.
I take it that you believe that "Stacy's" relief from her depression and anxiety is tied to her boyfriend's presence in the household. If you believe this, then it unfortunately ties both you and your daughter to him. And please don't let Brad be in charge of your life!
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