Dear Annie: My wife began volunteering at our local animal shelter last year, and at first I thought it was wonderful. She has always loved animals, and I was proud of her for giving her time to such a good cause.

The problem is that she has now brought home five dogs.

It started with one older dog she said no one else would adopt. Then came a nervous terrier who "just needed a quiet home." After that, there always seemed to be another emergency. We now have dogs sleeping on the couches, barking at the doorbell and competing for space in our bed.

Our two children love animals, but even they are overwhelmed. One dog chewed our son's baseball glove, another keeps having accidents in our daughter's room, and the kids have started avoiding inviting friends over because the house feels so chaotic. Last week, my daughter quietly asked me whether our home would ever feel normal again.

I have tried talking to my wife, but she says I am being heartless and that sending any of the dogs back would be cruel. I do not want to take away something that gives her purpose, but I also did not agree to turn our home into an extension of the shelter.

How do I make her understand that compassion for animals cannot come at the expense of the rest of the family? And is it unreasonable to insist that some of the dogs be rehomed? -- Living in the Doghouse

Dear Living in the Doghouse: Your wife certainly has a generous heart. But good intentions do not automatically make a peaceful home.

Each of your five dogs needs time, training, exercise, veterinary care and money. The barking, accidents and chewing are signs that some of them may be stressed or overwhelmed -- and, it seems, so is your family.

Sit down with your wife at a moment when no one is angry. Make a realistic list of what each dog needs and what your household can truly handle. Then speak with the shelter, your veterinarian and, if needed, a qualified trainer to find out for sure how to best deliver on those needs.

Some of the dogs may need different homes. Having to rehome a dog is not cruelty. A careful rehoming can be the kindest choice for everyone.

And from now on, no more surprise dogs. Bringing home a pet should require approval from both parties. One loving heart does not get five votes.

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"Out of Bounds: Estrangement, Boundaries and the Search for Forgiveness" is out now! Annie Lane's third anthology is for anyone who has lived with anger, estrangement or the deep ache of being wronged -- because forgiveness isn't for them. It's for you. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information. Follow Annie Lane on Instagram at @dearannieofficial. Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.