Life Advice

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Ask Amy: Older sister may be overly ‘sistering’

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have been trying to figure out how to deal with family members that decide to cut off all communication with me without explanation.

One episode happened with my niece, who is in her 30s.

The last thing I said to her was, "Would you like to come over to visit?"

Her response was, "Why do people keep trying to make me do things that...Read more

Ask Amy: Ex does not want to make up after breakup

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Over a decade ago, I escaped an extremely emotionally and sometimes physically abusive partner and proceeded to raise kind, compassionate, and successful children on my own.

Now in adulthood, all but one has established a relationship with this pretty much absent parent, who now wants to stage a get-together that includes my new ...Read more

Ask Amy: Flight or fight? These passengers choose both

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: On a short airplane flight, I was seated next to a woman who chatted to me nonstop about this and that, while I listened and smiled politely.

When she started to voice opinions that I didn't share and didn't want to discuss, I tried to wrap up the conversation and turned to my phone.

I texted my daughter an unkind remark about the ...Read more

Ask Amy: DNA reveals family secret and resentment

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Information I received from my genetic testing revealed that my father had two other children while married to my mother within our supposedly “intact” family.

I am allowing the picture I have of my past, my childhood, and my family to (painfully) reshape my personal history, as this knowledge integrates into my whole self.

This ...Read more

Ask Amy: Couple copes with texts and subtexts

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I recently went on a two-week vacation with my husband “Rob,” and “Patsy,” the wife of another couple we have traveled with in the past.

The husband did not want to go on this particular trip, so it was just the three of us.

From the first day, my husband was fawning all over Patsy, while completely ignoring me.

The three of...Read more

Ask Amy: Dad is sad that wife has become ‘mom’

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My spouse has changed so much, and I no longer enjoy her company.

As parents of two young children, we are pretty good parents and partners. Unfortunately, that is the only thing we are now.

She no longer cares about us as a couple, and only has enough bandwidth for our kids.

Everything else comes second, and my wish for a life ...Read more

Ask Amy: Saying ‘no’ to pushy house guests is seasonal

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: How does one gently say “no” to an acquaintance who calls and wants to visit my area and stay in my home?

They have visited in the past and I am accommodating, but I have kept my actual feelings quiet, so they will be surprised when I say “no.”

They are very demanding and judgmental, so I am stressed out just thinking about ...Read more

Ask Amy: Woman feels the tick tock biological clock

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a woman about to turn 35 years old. I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half. He is a wonderful, caring and nurturing man who will stick with me through thick and thin. He’d be a wonderful dad.

Neither of us have ever had children. We have had many discussions about our future: getting married, living together, and ...Read more

Ask Amy: Husband has a ‘mommy’ problem

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband isn’t capable of speaking with ME about decisions in our marriage and insists on running to his mommy for everything.

Instead of planning events that he and I could attend, he has to ask his mommy. Instead of speaking to me about what’s going on in his life, it has to be mommy.

We’ve been together for eight years and...Read more

Ask Amy: A broken couple pretends to be ‘whole’

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have been married for over 30 years. At our 25th anniversary dinner, my wife told me she was interested in trying an “open marriage.” I was shocked, thinking that we still had a strong desire for each other. Later, at a counseling session, when asked if she was physically attracted to me, she said flippantly, “Not now, never ...Read more

Ask Amy: In this relationship, the ‘comfort zone’ is a Twilight Zone

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My partner and I have been fighting nonstop. He wants me to step out of my comfort zone. I have tried.

I let my best friend stay over for a weekend, despite the overwhelming anxiety that something might happen between them while she was with us.

Now, he keeps making passing remarks that if she stays over again, and something happens,...Read more

Ask Amy: Family members are conflicted about compassion

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I have been invited to a family event. One of the other guests, a relative, was recently arrested for possessing child pornography.

I want to make it very clear that, as far as I know, he has not physically abused any children. My wife refuses to attend.

I’ve known this man my entire life. I have always liked him. Naturally, I was ...Read more

Ask Amy: This woman’s place is in the home – alone!

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I am a wife to a good husband who is 12 years older than I am.

We recently lost his wonderful mother (at age 93), and mine (she was 80 when she died).

I loved both of these women and I miss them terribly.

My mother lived with my husband and me for the past five years, and I took care of her.

Now that she is gone, I am craving ...Read more

Ask Amy: Husband’s secret could make for awkward vacation

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: I just found out (from reading an exchange of text messages) that my husband of 40 years has reconnected with an old girlfriend.

They have been actively corresponding for about a year. Both are in their 70s.

Their relationship is far more than a happy re-connection between old friends, catching up and sharing their news. They act ...Read more

Ask Amy: Post-divorce disclosure brings about dilemma

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: After we divorced (decades ago), at some point my ex-husband told me that he was the father of another boy (he and I have two sons).

He said the woman had used him as a “sperm donor” without his knowledge and that she wasn’t interested in him playing any role in the child’s life, nor did she want any money from him.

I’ve ...Read more

Ask Amy: Mother wonders if daughter is too happy

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My 31-year-old daughter is "happy with her size." She doesn't seem to mind that she's nearly 300 pounds at 5-foot 5-inches tall — until she has a mood swing and then she gets mad at me because I'm not big like her.

I never bring up the subject — ever.

I don't know what to say and have to be very careful how I address the subject....Read more

Ask Amy: Vaccination status stumps hesitant guests

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: Recently a couple with whom my husband and I were casual friends some years ago moved to our city.

We helped them with a few things related to their move, such as storing some of their items and finding various service people.

They're now settled into their new house and have asked us to come to dinner. However, based upon some ...Read more

Ask Amy: Bad chemistry leads to awkward visits

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My husband and I have spent several of the past few summers visiting (his) longtime family friends at their vacation home. They are always very kind and welcoming.

While I enjoy the wife in this couple, I find the husband to be very off-putting.

In the beginning, I put it down to my own distaste and made the best of the situation. I ...Read more

Ask Amy: Remote grandmother struggles to connect

Life Advice / Ask Amy /

Dear Amy: My only granddaughter is 17 years old.

Her mother was my only daughter, but she died 15 years ago.

We have lived 1,600 miles apart for years, now.

When she was going to turn 12, my husband and I flew her out to our house and she traveled with us for about three weeks.

We bonded well. I thought everything was going great when we ...Read more

 

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