ArcaMax

As my high school and college classmates and I have gotten older, I have noticed that when birthday shoutouts go out on Facebook, many say they thank God for "another trip around the sun." This wasn't a saying that I grew up hearing, but it definitely has special meaning now in the middle years of middle age. When I posted my birthday selfie on Facebook in August, thanking friends for their "warm and loving" well wishes, I got comments saying how beautiful and amazing I looked, which made me giggle a bit since I was rocking my Ohio State gear and hyping the upcoming college football season. But behind my engaging smile was a great testimony to perseverance through the challenges of caring for my mother. My mother and I are summer babies, and my mom celebrated her 86th birthday in June. I marked this birthday as a significant milestone for her due to two serious health scares this year: a pneumonia hospitalization in February followed by another hospital stay due to a pulmonary embolism in April. The pulmonary embolism frightened me the most, as my mother had a huge blood clot in her right leg. Her neurologist also concluded that she probably had a light stroke. From this diagnosis, I immediately realized that I should have had her exercise more after she was discharged from physical therapy, but I found it difficult to get her into a routine of movement around my work schedule, and although Mom was walking almost a mile a day in her 70s before she came to live with me, she did not complain about missing routine stretching and leg workouts. I bought her a desk elliptical after blood thinners were prescribed for her, which has enabled her to begin regaining her strength. In many ways, I have become her second physical therapist with the home health care she currently receives, and I have mastered using her gait belt for car and wheelchair transfers.

In one of my August columns last year, I talked about "slowing down on the traffic jam of life," which resonated with many readers, and I am continuing to learn how to take one day at a time as I balance work and caring for my mother. I have begun to follow more research on caregiving, looking to see how my situation compares to others nationally, and some statistics that I have come across have shown me how blessed I am. For example, according to Guardian Life findings from 2023, 41% of caregivers "report low overall well-being," only 23% stated their mental health was "good," 40% shared that their stress levels have increased due to their caregiving responsibilities, and 34.8% of caregivers aged 45 to 64 had a least two chronic conditions. I am fortunate to be in great health, able to maintain my wellness and endurance, and to be surrounded by a supportive pastor and church family who lift me up in prayer. This has significantly contributed to my not becoming overtaken by stress or depression. Now, I have had my struggles in caregiving, as everyone else going through this lifestyle adjustment has. I can recall many times when I got frustrated with my mother for not eating the way she should, not drinking enough water, and not following directions for her in-home therapy. But in those moments when I was throwing up my hands in weariness, God reminded me to think about how my mother feels being dependent on me, being separated from her close friends back home in Georgia, and adapting to her new surroundings. The assistance she needs from me now is vastly different from what it was last year, as I bathe, feed and dress her. This has truly humbled me as I learn to give thanks "in everything," as 1 Thessalonians 5:18 commands. I really like the New Living Translation of this verse, which says, "Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you who belong to Christ Jesus." My circumstances have drastically changed, but I give God thanks for my mother's life and mine, knowing that He is a refuge for us as we continue to trust in Him. I am grateful for the things my mother and I can still enjoy together, the simple things that I used to take for granted. On the last day of August (I celebrate my birthday the entire month), Mom and I had some vanilla ice cream and apple pie, and with all that we have been through this year, I cherished every minute.

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Dr. Jessica A. Johnson is a lecturer in the English department at Ohio State University's Lima campus. Email her at smojc.jj@gmail.com. Follow her on X: @JjSmojc. To find out more about Jessica Johnson and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate website at www.creators.com.

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