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Q: I was devastated when my husband recently left me and moved in with another woman. My kids are confused because their dad has been lying to them about where he's living and the reasons for our separation. What can I tell them?

Jim: I'm very sorry to hear about your situation. While I can understand your desire to protect your kids' innocence, it's also important to be honest with them about what's really going on. Be as forthright as you can be while taking their age and maturity into account.

I suggest you sit down with your kids and, using age-appropriate language, explain that Mom and Dad haven't been getting along, and that Dad has made some poor choices that are hurting the family. Definitely resist the temptation to badmouth your spouse, because you don't want to alienate him even further from the kids. If they ask about the other woman, give them a straightforward answer and explain that it makes you very sad that their father has moved in with her.

Most importantly, reassure your children of your love. Emphasize that you understand how painful this situation is for them. Encourage them to be open about their sadness and anger, but don't allow them to engage in aggressive or destructive behavior. Writing and journaling are good emotional outlets for older kids. Younger children sometimes find it helpful to express their feelings by drawing pictures.

Focus on the Family exists to help people in your situation, so I invite you to contact our counselors for more specific insights. They'll provide a one-time free consultation and can also refer you to qualified professionals in your area who can help you and your children navigate this very difficult time. The number to call is 855-771-HELP (4357). I wish you the best.

Q: My wife and I have been married for four years. Our relationship is good overall, but her impulsive spending habits are a source of constant stress. We have the same argument every month when we get the credit card statement. She cries and apologizes -- and then keeps spending! What can I do?

Dr. Greg Smalley, Vice President, Marriage & Family Formation: You've probably heard the old adage about doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results. That's something we probably all struggle with at times! But from your description of what's happening in your marriage, it's clear that you need a different approach.

Of course, money is a very emotional topic; in fact, financial stress and disagreements are consistently listed as a leading cause of divorce. People spend and save for a variety of reasons that are often rooted in needs like security, comfort, relational power and validation. So, when you and your wife have your monthly credit card confrontation, you're not just discussing dollars and cents. Like everything else in marriage, you need to dig deeper and communicate openly.

Instead of reacting to the bill every month, I'd suggest proactively addressing this issue. A good place you can start is Dave Ramsey's Financial Peace University (www.DaveRamsey.com). The resources there can help you and your wife work through a budget based on principles that you both can agree on. We also have plenty of additional tips and insights at FocusOnTheFamily.com/Marriage/money-and-finances.

Meanwhile, since financial issues involve emotions and relational tension, you might also want to seek the help of a wise and caring marriage counselor. It's an investment that will pay off by strengthening your relationship. Our staff counselors can help you get started and refer you to a licensed therapist near you; call the number listed above. I wish you the best.

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Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author, and president of Focus on the Family and host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at jimdalyblog.focusonthefamily.com or at Facebook.com/JimDalyFocus.

Copyright 2026 Focus On The Family. (This feature may not by reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without written permission of Focus on the Family.)

COPYRIGHT 2026 Andrews McMeel Syndication. This feature may not be reproduced or distributed electronically, in print or otherwise without the written permission of Andrews McMeel Syndication.