Life Advice



Ask Amy: Long-term grudge earns a penalty for 'holding'

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

When I look at their family, I reflect, and I feel like I was a good mom.

I carry baggage from my own crazy family, and I’ve tried very hard not to let my own background guide my life.

I am driving myself nuts about this small situation that is actually huge – to me.

Samantha has a wall in her home with various family pictures arranged on it.

I am not on this wall. There are pictures of other family members – some of whom she has said she does not even like.

I feel left out and like I'm not good enough to be there. I realize that’s my own baggage, but I can’t help it.


I know if I say anything to anyone, I will be told that I'm overreacting.

How do I approach this? Should I? Am I overreacting?

– Feeling Left Out in CA

Dear Feeling Left Out: When looking at a relative’s photo collection, I think it is a universal impulse to look for yourself. When looking at your own child’s photo collection, this impulse is magnified many-fold.


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