ArcaMax

Dear Amy: My mother raised eight children. She is now in her late-70s, and lives alone.

Recently she received a cancer diagnosis and we have been taking turns getting her to appointments and helping with errands, chores, meals, etc.

We are happy to help, and tell her so.

My problem is that she gets very emotional and constantly apologizes to ...Read more

Dear Amy: I dated a former boyfriend over three years ago. We met through a dating app.

I was in the process of moving to the same area where he lived (but not because of him). He broke up with me, and I was OK with that.

Afterward, he contacted me a few more times.

A few months after we broke up, I agreed to meet with him, thinking that it ...Read more

Dear Amy: Six years ago, I developed a difficult cancer with a life expectancy of three to six months.

After many months of chemo, I received a donor bone marrow transplant from a specialty hospital where I was for several more months.

The transplant was “successful” and the probability of reoccurrence is low.

I worked very hard at ...Read more

Dear Amy: I have been happily married for 39 years. The few “disagreements” we’ve had always seem to center around my husband’s family.

The latest has to do with my brother-in-law.

He has always had a very entitled attitude.

When my mother-in-law passed away in 2020, the car she recently bought was taken over by him. I was fine with ...Read more

Dear Amy: I am a 65-year-old woman. I rekindled a relationship with a man I have known for over 50 years. He and I dated briefly (for six months) six years ago, and I was totally into him.

We stopped seeing each other because he was financially irresponsible. I could not see myself paying for everything with no help from him.

Fast-forward to ...Read more

Dear Amy: From the day we met, over 40 years ago, my wife and I have been social drinkers.

Get-togethers at weddings, holidays, concerts, sporting events, etc., have always featured alcohol.

While I can have a couple of drinks and stop, when it comes to my wife — not so much.

She will keep ordering drinks right up to 2 a.m. And while ...Read more

Dear Amy: I have trouble insulating myself from the anxiety caused by my young adult sons’ life issues. They are 21 and 26 years old.

I’ve done what I could as a mom to raise independent adults. They are doing well for the most part (the younger still in college), but we are close and they confide in me. This can really send me into a ...Read more

Dear Amy: My question is about family obligations — both financial and emotional. My sister and I are both in our 70s and retired.

She has made life choices that have left her alone and out of money with serious health issues. She has had multiple marriages that failed. She quit working at a young age (30s) due to health concerns.

I believe ...Read more

Dear Amy: I am a 16-year-old girl.

School is OK (I’m a sophomore), but one thing I notice is the fact that I am really judgmental. I tend to have bad and judgmental thoughts about others.

For example, if I see a girl wearing revealing clothing, I will call her a "slut” or a “whore" inside my head. Or if I see a boy wearing pajamas or ...Read more

Dear Amy: I have traveled to meet a wonderful man that I am really anxious to get to know better. I paid for the first trip to visit him.

He sent me a check for the upcoming second trip to visit him.

I am so excited to see him on this next trip, but I’m hesitant to cash the check.

I am leaning toward not cashing the check and just paying ...Read more

Dear Amy: Like a lot of people these days, my adult children and many of my friends are spread out all over the country. I try to stay in touch with them by making short trips to visit them.

These trips are usually four or five days (two days of which are travel days) and include the expenses of airfare, accommodations, entertainment, pet ...Read more

Dear Amy: I am a 45-year-old woman who was just diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum.

I never suspected I might be autistic until last year, when a friend discovered that she was autistic and sent me some articles about the non-stereotypical ways autism can present itself in women.

After going through the professional evaluation process ...Read more

Dear Amy: My brother has been married twice.

He and his first wife had two children. During the divorce, he tried to gain custody of the children, but she was awarded custody, and he stayed in contact with his two children for a while. But then things turned for the worst when she accused my brother of child abuse. She also physically ...Read more

Dear Amy: I'm the youngest of three siblings. My two brothers live a couple of states away from our parents, who are in their 80s. I live the farthest away, on the opposite coast.

At the beginning of the pandemic, like most families, we connected on Zoom. There were tech hurdles for my parents, but they navigated them as best they could.

A ...Read more

Dear Amy: My husband and I have been married for 19 years.

His brother is an alcoholic, which is a common theme in his family.

He has been unfaithful to his wife on numerous occasions.

At a family event (about six years ago), he made sexual advances toward me.

I told my husband that his brother makes me very uncomfortable and I do not want ...Read more

Dear Amy: My mom and I have had a bumpy relationship ever since my parents got divorced about 10 years ago.

Instead of finding healthy ways to cope, my mother blamed me (and my brother) for her unhappiness during a time when we were trying to get on our feet as adults.

We slowly worked things out and talk by phone a couple of times a week.

I ...Read more

Dear Amy: I have an etiquette question.

Is it still acceptable to refer to men as "gentlemen" and women as "ladies?”

I have read that some people may take offense to the use of those words.

At baseball games that I attend, the team used to be introduced on the field by the announcer saying, "And now, ladies and gentlemen, here are your ...Read more

Dear Amy: My parents are wonderful people. They have a long-time friend, “Roger,” who is a heavy drinker and doesn’t have a family of his own. He doesn’t seem to reciprocate their friendship, and they seem to accept Roger as something of a family member – he’s just someone who is often around.

I am a 40-year-old woman and have known...Read more

Dear Amy: We have lovely neighbors. They are great. We feel so lucky!

I am a professional landscape designer, and just a little – uptight – about my own garden.

I try not to impose my anal retentive obsessions upon others unless they are paying me to do so, but holy noxious weeds – my neighbors' lesser celandine is taking over!

This is ...Read more

Dear Amy: My boyfriend "Steve" and I have been together for over two years. He is extremely kind and generous to me. I can see a long-term future with him.

Steve is divorced with three children, ages 5 (a son “A”), 7 (a daughter, “B"), and 9 (a son, “C").

He and his ex-wife have an acrimonious relationship, but have a loose agreement ...Read more