Life Advice



Ask Amy: Caregiving duties create sibling resentment

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Lonely: I’m so sorry for this loss, and certainly for the loneliness that has followed.

Oftentimes people make these promises after a loss, but don’t follow through in part because after the structured memorial events are over, we don’t seem to have any cultural roadmap for what to do next.

People are wary and uncomfortable navigating another person’s loss, but as you point out, it’s actually easy! A phone call, an invitation for coffee, a visit.

Instead, you likely feel dropped.

I hope you will be a little bit proactive here. How about if you make a phone call to ask a friend if they can meet you for coffee? Others who have lost spouses, especially, might jump at the chance to get together.

I also hope you’ll rejoin your church family. Ask your son to give you a ride and stay for coffee hour.

Dear Amy: Your response to “Stop Haunting my Dreams” brought me up short. You mentioned that you have a recurring dream of appearing for a final exam in college but landing in the wrong room.

I have the exact same dream!


– Graduate

Dear Graduate: Scores of people responded, experiencing the same dream!

I suggest that we all sync our dreams and show up at the wrong room en masse. Some of us might not be wearing pants.


(You can email Amy Dickinson at or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

©2023 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.




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