Life Advice



Ask Amy: Grandparents want house rules for extended stay

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Slighted: My main reaction is to your choice to cash in your savings and “retire” at the age of 50. By cashing out early, you’ve already lost a percentage of your savings through a penalty.

You and your husband are at least 12 years away from the possibility of receiving Social Security. Even if he is receiving disability compensation, this is an extremely short-sighted choice to make.

My second reaction is to your choice to give a portion of this money away to people who don’t need it or – it seems – want it.

I hope you will reflect on your own situation and make sounder financial choices.

And yes – you should let your sons know exactly how wounded you feel.

Dear Amy: Like you, I, too, was a waitress.

I will happily leave 20 percent or more to a server who is pleasant and attentive. However, a server who slams a dish down on the table and never even makes eye contact during the whole meal will be lucky to even get 15 percent.


The original meaning was "To Insure Promptness." Times have changed.

– NC Appreciative Reader

Dear Reader: Thank you for the reminder of what a “tip” is supposed to reward.


(You can email Amy Dickinson at or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)

©2021 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.




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