Ask Amy: Friend struggles to respond to #metoo accusation
Dear Amy: I have been good friends with “James” and “Dennis” for over 30 years, since we were all in grad school. We shared many laughs.
James and Dennis remain best friends today; we don’t see each other very often, but we do stay in touch.
Dennis has been happily married for about 10 years. James has been in a committed relationship with “Lori” for over 20 years. I’ve only met her a few times, but I like her, and we’re connected on Facebook.
Lori has been through a lot during the pandemic, including the loss of her mother. She has used Facebook to reach out for support.
Lori recently shared on Facebook that when she first met Dennis, in James’ presence, Dennis grabbed her behind. And that many times since then when the three have gotten together, he grabbed/groped her.
This made her very uncomfortable, but her husband told her it was her problem.
In her posting on Facebook, she tagged it #metoo.
I was shocked to read this. I have never experienced or witnessed such behavior by Dennis. He is very gregarious, but this is out of character.
I don’t know what, if anything, I should do with this information.
As a woman, I should stand with other women who speak the names of those who sexually assaulted (Lori's word) them, but as a longer-time friend of the accused, I feel loyalty to Dennis, too.