Ask Amy: Long-married couple copes with negativity
– Concerned in DC
Dear Concerned: I appreciate the fact that you read the Washington Post; I believe that this may actually provide a clue about your wife’s state of mind.
Events during the previous administration may have triggered her anxiety and negativity, but actually living in or near DC, surrounded by politically engaged and concerned fellow citizens, as well as being in physical proximity to protests and the insurrection following the election, could be keeping her in place.
Negative thoughts tend to be “sticky,” leading to rumination.
Your wife might have inherited her father’s basic temperament, but the fact that she wants to change her perspective means that she can.
My suggestions for her are: Disengage completely from social media. Within the first 24 hours, she should notice a change in her basic outlook.
Turn off the TV and spend some time each day reading a novel and/or poetry.
Read up on mindfulness and meditation and start and end each day with a deliberate choice to list three things she is grateful for and spend time quietly thinking about each one.
Spend as much time as possible outdoors, preferably in nature.
Volunteer! The Smithsonian has a cool project where any citizen can help to transcribe documents from their huge historical collection. Check transcription.si.edu for information on how to get started.
...continued
