Life Advice



Ask Amy: Affair that didn’t go well, didn’t end well

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: I am not pretending to be a saint, but was I wrong to end my “on again/off again” involvement with a married man in the way I did?

After suspecting that he wasn't being very truthful to me, I dug up some information about him online, which was basically glaring evidence just sitting there for online sleuths like myself to uncover.

We had always been friends and for the most part he took care of me in ways I didn’t demand. I knew this was an affair, and not a partnership, and I was OK with that.

After finally discovering his lies, I sent him screenshots of what I uncovered. He immediately began sending me angry texts and calling, but I didn't answer until hours later because there was nothing he could do to disprove what I had long suspected.

I essentially told him in a text that he was lucky that I didn't let his family, friends, and colleagues know what a two-faced liar he really was.

I blocked him right after that, so I have no idea if he tried contacting me again, and I don't care.


I did not really appreciate how in the weeks leading up to our split, he was demanding to know who I was with and what I was doing.

I began to feel like a toy.

I have been wanting to end this for good but could never find the emotional strength to do so.

After a few therapy sessions, I felt empowered, and so I ended things and haven't looked back.


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