Life Advice



Ask Amy: Honeymoon ended before it began

Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

Dear Amy: When I started seeing my guy, we were so in tune and on the same page about everything!

About a month into dating, a switch was flipped.

While I’m making some of the biggest steps forward in my life and seeing incredible professional opportunities, he is facing jail time.

I know that it’s incredibly stressful for him.

He gets upset when I ask what happened to the honeymoon phase of our relationship; he’s hardly available for me, as he needs to save to pay his bills for the two to three months he’ll be gone.

We love each other and want to be together. But he won’t show up for me emotionally, and it’s hard.


I’ve suggested a break until he’s back in the summer. Now he promises to be more emotionally available.

I’m struggling to decide if it’s worth the sadness I feel waiting this out, but I want to be there for him.

But what if this is just what he’s always like? Sometimes he’s cold, other times demanding. He goes back and forth. He says things and doesn’t follow through. I’m always waiting.

I don’t want to wait for no reason or just so he can use me (and my pocketbook). But I also don’t want to leave because I know that facing jail time is extremely scary. I know I’m empathetic in love, to a fault.


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