ArcaMax

-- Friend Indeed

Dear Friend Indeed: I remember during my time as a single mother the tension I would occasionally feel over social occasions that were not meant to include children.

And so I got a babysitter.

It can be hard to find, afford and keep a reliable sitter. Some parents simply don't want to leave their children at home.

And yet, just as toddlers increase their distance from their parents, occasionally parents must also venture out on their own. This is great for parents, and -- given the right circumstances -- it is also important for children to see that their parents occasionally do things without them.

Young children know through their experiences that they can adjust to another person in the household, and that -- hooray -- their parents always return.

You are a generous friend to include and involve your bestie's child whenever you can.

Those times when you can't (or don't want to), you should give your friend plenty of advance notice and say, "I hope you can get a sitter for the 15th, because we're having a dinner party and would love for you to be able to come!"

There will be times when your friend won't be able to make it. She will be disappointed. But you should not be afraid of her, or her disappointment.

Dear Amy: You asked for suggestions for "Delicate's" problem: how to dispose of old porn magazines.

Magazines are great for composting! I use them to enhance my garden.

-- Happy Gardener

Dear Happy: Great suggestion! I also use magazines (and cardboard) under mulch to create new garden beds (the "lasagna" method).

Growing gorgeous flowers over a layer of porn sounds just right.

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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: askamy@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)