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Jimmy Finds Martha Stewart in His Coat Pocket (Cold Open) | The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon

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Jimmy finds Martha Stewart in his winter coat while checking to see what he left in his pockets from last season.

 


 

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Confession

Jokes /

Matthew goes into a confessional box and says "Bless me father for I have sinned, I have been with a loose woman."

The Priest says "is that you Matthew?"

"Yes father, it is I."

"Who was the woman you were with?"

"I ...Read More

No Sound Support

Jokes /

I recently purchased a new PC from one of the major computer manufacturers. I placed my order via the web but asked for them to call me for my credit card information.

So, after a couple days of phone tag, I got in touch ...Read More

A New Year Prayer For the Elderly

Jokes /

God, grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway,
The good fortune to run into the ones that I do,
And the eyesight to tell the difference.

Flakey Murder

Jokes /

Two police officers respond to a crime scene behind a grocery store. The homicide detective is already there.

"What happened?" asks the first officer.

"Male, about twenty-five, covered in Raisin Bran and dead as a ...Read More

Mess Maker

Jokes /

A woman said to her friend, "I don't know what to do. My husband is such a mess maker that you can't imagine. He doesn't put anything in its place, I am always going around the house organizing things."

The friend ...Read More

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