Ask Amy: Enabling robs adult son of growth
– Intrigued
Dear Intrigued: The answer is “yes” to all of your suggestions.
The experience of engaging in therapy can inspire and motivate people to dive in and then dive deeper. Running an idea or an impulse past me is easier than bringing it up in therapy, and might be a person’s way of “practicing” a revelation before confronting it in therapy.
Engagement with a therapist will make a client curious about the process, as well as the result.
If their therapy leads them toward change, they might want a “gut check” or encouragement from a third party.
If their therapy isn’t helping – or they feel stuck – they may seek permission to quit, or to change therapists.
Therapy can inspire a sincere journey toward change and healing.
I’m here for all of it.
Dear Amy: As a caregiver to a loved one with a terminal illness, I wish to add two recommendations on how people should NOT respond to this news:
First, do not minimize the illness!
Second, do not intrude on others’ privacy (“I heard he's sick, with what? What's the prognosis, and how's he handling it?”).
– Thanks, From the Trenches
Dear From the Trenches: Caregiving at this level is a relentless process of learning while doing. Thank you for passing your wisdom along.
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(You can email Amy Dickinson at askamy@amydickinson.com or send a letter to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or Facebook.)
©2023 Amy Dickinson. Distributed by Tribune Content Agency, LLC.
