Ask Amy: Insecure wife blames herself for insecurity
You wouldn’t be triggered into your unhealthy phone-checking if your husband simply shared these conversations with you: “Sharon said the funniest thing about a movie she just saw. It’s hilarious. Check it out…”
If you are secretly checking his phone and he knows it, he should bring this communication into the realm of your relationship and hand his phone to you.
You say that you recently stopped checking his phone – “when you got into a good spot,” but I suggest that you might have gotten into a good spot because you had stopped checking his phone. The behavior itself triggers your insecurity.
You can both consciously alter your behavior in order to be full and trusting partners.
Dear Amy: A year ago, my best friend, "Terri" got her real estate license. She has been working very hard to build her clientele. She has succeeded in selling two homes and being the buyer's agent for three home sales.
My husband and I want to buy a home soon, and I'm conflicted on whether to hire her as our agent. She's a wonderful friend and we've been through thick and thin together.
On the one hand, I want to do everything I can to support my friend in her new career. I think she has excellent qualities, and she would do a good job for us.
I also worry that she would be hurt if we didn't choose her.
However, my husband is nervous about her lack of experience, and I worry that if we disagreed in this transaction, it would hurt our friendship.
What do you think we should do?