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Rolodex rancher trolls contacts

By Amy Dickinson, Tribune Content Agency on

You should not take this silence personally; you should accept it for what it is: a social cue.

Please, do NOT respond to silence with more persistence. In social interactions, most often you should try to mirror the behavior of the other person. If you know you have the correct contact information and reach out a couple of times and don't get a response, then yes - you should remove the person from your contact list.

Dear Amy: I'm a recent college grad. I just received a very good job offer. This offer has been causing me immense stress, anxiety, and misery. It's certainly not what I ever dreamed of doing, and I don't feel like I fit into the company or the industry.

I feel horrible because I know this should bring me joy. I'm constantly getting told that this is an amazing opportunity and that I should be happy. When I express my hesitation, family members tell me it will be great. I'm not sure I believe that.

I want to turn this offer down, but I need the money. I really appreciate everything my parents have done for me, and I really want to help them out, but I can't shake my dread when I think about spending even one day in this position.

Your insight?

 

-- Anxious Post-Grad

Dear Anxious: If this is the wrong industry for you, then resist the pressure from your folks and actively pursue other work. But I suspect that the idea of everyday work itself might be also overwhelming for you.

Psst: I have a secret. Everything new is scary for me. Sometimes I get so nervous, I write out a script for myself and rehearse in the mirror.

Here's what I tell myself: "I'm going to try this thing. If I don't like it or it doesn't work out, I'll stop doing it!"

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