Girlfriend's control raises red flags
My instinct is that she is a little afraid. She knows that the presence of this other family and this crowded household will provide a buffer for her.
You have to communicate about this. When you talk to her, ask her to outline her reasoning, and listen carefully to what she tells you.
A reasonable compromise might be for you two to rent a furnished apartment for three months or so while you sort out the particulars of your marriage, as well as your living situation.
Dear Amy: "Coffee Shop Patron" was sitting next to some loud girls.
I was glad you pointed out that interjecting is typically a useless act and can also create blowback. It's best to move out of earshot or leave.
Personally, I have a naturally loud voice and can be quite animated when I am at restaurants and so occasionally I get a person complaining to me directly.
I feel I am more distracting than disruptive.
Last time, a fellow complained to me that he and his table couldn't have a conversation because I was so animated and so I just looked at him and said, "Wow. That's the first time I've been blamed for someone else being boring!"
He should have taken a page from your book.
-- Animated
Dear Animated: I guess you can add rudeness to your list of attributes.
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(You can contact Amy Dickinson via email: ASKAMY@amydickinson.com. Readers may send postal mail to Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. You can also follow her on Twitter @askingamy or "like" her on Facebook.)
