Father wants to foxtrot at Daddy/Daughter dance
Dear Amy: My 10-year-old daughter has a school sponsored Daddy/Daughter Dance coming up.
The dance is "girl's choice" of escorts, and she has told me it is her year to take her stepfather.
Ever since her mother and I got divorced seven years ago, her mother has done everything possible to convince our children that I am replaceable, including pressuring our daughter to go to this dance with her stepfather rather than me.
My ex and I share custody of our two daughters (the other is 17). I only go to this dance if my custody overlaps with the Friday of the dance. It has overlapped for the last several years, and it does this year, too. I was expecting to attend this year, just as I have in the past.
Amy, this is our second-to-last year for this dance. After that, it's middle school.
Should I take the high road here and support her choice, even though I know it is being made under duress?
Or is there a way I can let her know I really want to take her without putting pressure on her?
Should I volunteer at the dance so we can at least have one dance together? I usually try to stay above their mom's hateful behavior toward me, but this really hurts.
-- Dad in Turmoil
Dear Dad: Yes, take the high road. Regardless of your ex-wife's attitude toward you, your daughter does have a stepfather, and you should respect that he is one of her parents.
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